Jiara surrender ♡

Part 4

JJ's pov
I wake up and I feel someone touching my chest. I'm confused my head hurts but I'm pretty sure I haven't brought any girl home yesterday. I open my eyes and rub them to try and take this confusion away. I look better and I see Kie laying there peacefully. Her lips were partly open,her breath was calm. Her tiny hands on my chest fully relaxed. She looks like an angel. She's beautiful. She has all her clothes on and I'm glad she has them on because that means we didn't do nothing just cus we were drunk or something. That's what I have every night and I couldn't do that to Kie. I don't know she's just so special I couldn't do it so casually as I do it with other girls. Yes I always thought of having sex with Kie she's a hot, rich girl who loves being around us pogues. Her body is amazing and she's gorgeous I've always noticed that and I've always hit on her but kinda as joke because we like to joke around with eachother. Yes I've tried some moves on her because I wouldn't mind at all kissing her, touching her and hear her scream my name so loud... When I'm thinking of it I remember what happened last night. I was so drunk and my head hurts but I remember last night. I was destroyed and so hurt about everything that happened in the last two months but I was even more destroyed because I had hurt Kie. So I started drinking and then text her  and then she got here. She hugged me and I told her that's not how I treat the girl and I almost told her I have feelings for her. Fuck I have feelings for her it's clear now. All the butterflies and those weird shit I felt around her. Is this love, is this what it feels like? And when I was about to say it to her she stopped me thank god. I couldn't deal with my drunks words after and would probably be an asshole again. I'm not able to say what I feel I get stuck and push people away. I know it's messed up but I can't. Am I probably broken and afraid yeah so I won't let anyone see it. But with Kie it's normal for me to cry and let everything out. I trust her and I feel safe around her but letting her know how I feel no that's not an option. As I stare there at her while her hands are on my chest I realize this is kind of creepy me staring at her so I try and get up slowly so I don't wake her up. The other day I overheard her talking with her father about not sleeping well and having nightmares but that she didn't want any medication to sleep. So I will let her sleep because she's actually relaxed.
Kiara's pov
I wake up and feel someone beside me moving. It's JJ I have my hands on his chest.
- JJ are you okay? Do you need something?- I ask worried.
- I am okay Kie I was just trying to get up without waking you . You seemed so relaxed and I know you have been having some troubles sleeping I...
- Oh okay.- while we're talking I still have my hands on his chest and this turns weird all of the sudden because we are really close and there's this tension between us.- I just thought you needed something- I say while taking my hands of his body.
- I'm fine Kie just try and sleep more it's very early still.- he says kissing my forehead gently and covering me up with the blanket. I feel the butterflies again that shiver running trough my body. My heart starts beating fast. I remember what he said and I just need to know if it's true.
JJ's pov
While I walk out the room to go make some breakfast with what I can find on John B's place Kie asks:
- Hey do you remember last night?
I panic with that question. I remember it all to well but I can't talk  about it.
- Kie I don't remember anything I drank way too much.- I lie with all the teeth I have in my mouth.
- Oh okay.
She seems disappointed with the answer she seems sad. Does she want to have that conversation with me? Does she feel the same butterflies as me? Okay the tension between us was there a few moments ago I wanted to kiss her but does she want the same. I don't think so, probably her tone while saying "Oh okay"
it's just something from my head. Even If I want to I just can't let her know how I feel and I've felt all this time about her. I'm not able to do it.
- Just sleep more Kie. You need it.- I say while leaving the room.

AN: I love this chapter I'm so proud of it. Also did you notice the reference to all to well by my baby Taylor Swift. hahahah I used some lyrics. Okay I love you guys thanks for the support. Treat people with kindness.
Xoxo,
Sophie🌺