The irreversible binding

Potions class

Harry had always hated Potions. Since first year, when Professor Snape proved to have a strong dislike for not only the Gryffindor house but also Harry Potter. Actually, he had a stronger dislike for Harry than anyone else. To the point that he thought he had tried to kill in a Quidditch match his first year. He believed Snape was an awful man and to him, for a very long time, he believed that his hate for the man for correct. He had proven he was Death Eater. He had killed Albus Dumbledore and that was something unforgivable to Harry.

That was until the battle of Hogwarts. Snape has killed Dumbledore so they had all believed that he was the owner of the Elder wand. Which resulted in Snapes death. Harry was there for it and Snape offered Harry to see his memories before he died. He found out that day that the man was not actually evil. In fact, actually cared about the him.

Since that day, he couldn't hate potions. He wasn't good at brewing them still but he didn't dread potions. Most classes started off him remembering the man walking into the class with his grumpy attitude and his insults... and he missed them. Even being partnered up with Malfoy couldn't change his new found like for the class. He never dreaded the class anymore.

Today though, he couldn't lie. He did not want to go into the classroom and sit next to His partner. And it seemed Malfoy was sharing the same feelings towards him.

He walked into the potions classroom and saw Malfoy in his usual seat at their table in the back of the room.

Ever since they came back for their 8th year, Malfoy had been different than he ever had been. The Snarky comments and the arrogant pride had all he seemed to crumble away after the war. He avoided interacting with people it seemed. No one at the Slytherin table sat with him and talked to him. He was never not alone. It was something Harry had of course noticed but he never felt inclined to care.

Malfoy had done this to himself. He had picked the wrong side and lost. Showing up to Wizengamot to fight for Malfoy was in his opinion, more than the boy deserved. No matter if he had saved his life in the Malfoy Manor. Harry had done the same in the room of requirement. It wasn't like they actually cared about each other or thought each other in a different light.

Malfoy had proven that when they got back to Hogwarts. He had lost all his friend, his family... Everything. That showed around everyone else in the entire school. But when it came to Harry, the boy was the same. Maybe not as rude, but he could never escape the boy. It was like he was there to torment his every second of every day.

They shared the same 8th year Dorms now. He was lucky Malfoy got put in a different room or he would have died. They had almost all the exact same classes. Granted he only had to interact with him in potions really. Ever time he turned a corner. There he was. Every time he entered a room. There he was. It drove Harry crazy.

Today, wasn't like usual though. He sat next to the boy and as of on instinct, the boy next to him tensed. And that's how he stayed. All of class. Tense.

It didn't matter if he was passing Harry ingredients to prepare or if he was brewing the potion, the didn't relax next to harry. He didn't say anything to him. Not one word. Not one rude comment. Nothing.

After what felt like an eternity, he heard the bell from the clock tower releasing them from class. It didn't surprise him when Malfoy stood up at the sound, grabbed his stuff and ran out the door so quick Harry couldn't even process what was happening. And this bothered him. Harry didn't do this to them. He shouldn't be acting like Harry was some kind of repulsive wizard.

Harry grabbed his things and walked quickly after Malfoy.

Why am I following him?

"Malfoy!" He said with hint of annoyance in his voice as he had followed the boy down an empty corridor. Malfoy stopped in his tracks but didn't turn around. "What do you want Potter?" Draco didn't sound annoyed. He sounded like he was trying desperately to escape. But Harry didn't care. He needed to say something to Malfoy.

"What? You tell me you drink some potion that makes you fall in love with me and then the next day all the sudden you can't even have a normal class with me? You acted weird that entire class. What is wrong with you?" Draco turned around at Harry's words and shakes his head.

"This isn't a normal day for me Harry. I'm not normal anymore. There is no such thing. I'm sorry that you get the easy end of this. All you have to do is go about your day. I don't get that opportunity. And your a selfish ass if you didn't take that into consideration." Harry felt a little bad right now. Malfoys emotions seemed to be actually killing him inside.

Was I being inconsiderate?

"I'm not selfish. I just don't see why you can't have a normal class with me now. It bothers me that your so tense." He looked at Malfoy and realized that he really didn't like seeing Malfoy that way. But the didn't mean anything. Of course he wouldn't want to see Malfoy that way. The boy told him he loved him yesterday. That would make anyone uncomfortable.

"Harry," Draco started but stopped. He seemed to be deep in thought for a second.

When did he start saying his name like that?

"Malfoy." Harry said back waiting for an answer.

"What if... what if we had become friends back then?" He said looking at the ground with a sad expression written all over his face. The question took Harry by surprise.

"What? What do you mean?" Harry asked Malfoy with a confused tone on voice. Malfoy looked up from the ground but the same cold sad look say on this face.

"What if you would have shaken my hand? What if I hadn't been that awful kid? I know it's the stupid potion that makes me want to spill out all my secrets to you like your all the sudden my best friend, but I can't deny that it's the one thing I always asked myself. What would have happened if I had become your friend? What is I had put all my selfish pureblood arrogance behind me and just been your friend? It's always been my biggest regret you know." He sighed and looked back down at the ground again and Harry couldn't find words to respond to what he had said. Malfoy stayed quiet for a long moment causing the awkward silence. And when Malfoy spoke again, he was crying?

"I have had the potion in my blood for not even 24 hours and all I can think about is the regret. And I want to reach out to you. I want to start all over again. I want to be your friend. I want to be in your life. I want you Harry. And I know that I can't have it and the feeling hurts. Yet all you have to do is walk into the room, being perfect Harry Potter, the-boy-who-lives, champion gryffindor seeker, savior of the wizarding world. And all the sudden it doesn't matter if I regret being your friend. Some kind of hope ignites Inside and all it does it take 10 seconds for that hope to vanish and become what it is. A disappointment. And I'm sorry but it hurts. And I can't deal with it Harry."

Harry didn't move from where he was standing. Even after Malfoy had walked away quickly, he couldnt bring himself to move. Everything Malfoy had said today as well as yesterday was sleeping through him.

I can't care about Malfoy... can I?