With You (Sahyo TWICE)

Chapter 11

Jihyo's POV

I was surrounded by a bunch of strangers on a stage. They were yelling insults at me, calling me fat, unwanted, useless, the whole thing I thought I'd gotten over. I tried to yell back, but every time I opened my mouth, nothing came out. The other members were no where to be found. As they yelled, I started shrinking physically in size until their legs were as tall as trees.  Then I became so small I simply disappeared.

And I craved the feeling of disappearing. I wanted to vanish, to go away. It's not like I mattered to anyone anymore.

And that's what scared me the most.

I woke up in a cold sweat, not knowing where I was, my heart racing. I breathed a sigh of relief when I felt Sana clinging onto me from behind. I thought she was asleep until I felt kisses being pressed into the back of my neck.

"Did you have a nightmare?" Sana whispered, her breath tickling my ear. "You were screaming in your sleep."

Shit, now everyone knows how much of a mess you are.

Shut up.

You can't even deal with your own fucking mind. Pathetic.

I sighed mentally.

"Yeah, had a nightmare. I'm fine," I whispered back. The lie stung.

"You're not, baby. You were crying."

Was I? I reached up to touch my cheeks and found out that they were, indeed, damp.

"I didn't know," I pushed myself further into her embrace.

She sighed and squeezed me tighter. "It's hard to see you like this," she said quietly.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled.

"Don't be. It's not your fault."

Yes it is. She's lying.

No she's not. It's YOUR fault.

Who's the one who ditched everyone in her selfishness?

I turned around to face her and found her eyes staring back at mine. People always talk about the beauty of blue or green eyes, but there was an unmatched depth to Sana's brown ones that you just don't find in brighter colors.

She wiped my cheek with her thumb. I hadn't even noticed I'd started to cry again. She slowly retracted her arms from around my and lay on her back, pulling me on top of her and wrapping her arms around my waist. I rested the side of my head on her chest and closed my eyes.

"I'm not going to force anything out of you," Sana continued quietly, "but it's not good to keep everything bottled up." She rubbed my back with her thumb.

"I'll try to tell you tomorrow," I whispered shakily, hoping this was a promise I could keep.

"Okay." She kissed the top of my head repeatedly. "I love you."

"I love you too."

Sana's POV

I woke up the next morning with Jihyo on top of me, her head on my chest and her legs tangled up with mine. She was asleep, breathing steadily. With one hand, I carefully checked the time on my phone. 10:23. We had performance on The Show at 3:30. I didn't know if Jihyo would be participating, but I hoped she wouldn't be. As much as I missed her, she needed the rest. I kissed the top of head. She stirred and raised her head, looking around confusingly.

"Hi." I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Her hair looked perfect, while I, on the other hand, was sure I had a bedhead that would surely attract even the surliest of peacocks. She smiled brightly and I practically melted. But then I remembered her promise.

"You don't have to tell me anything..." I rubbed her back. "But I'm here to listen if you want to."

"Can I just tell you one thing? About the nightmare?" She whispered.

I nodded.

"People were...insulting me." Her eyes filled up with tears. I pulled her face into my neck. It was obviously much more than that, but I wasn't going to push her. I was just taking it one step at a time.

"Do you want to go eat?" I asked. She looked up with watery eyes, hesitating.

"I'm not really hungry-"

"Does this have anything to do with the nightmare?" I patted her cheek.

She nodded slowly. "People were calling me
fat," she buried her face in my neck again. I squeezed her hard. It hurt to see her like that, but I was glad she was being more open with me.

"Don't do this to yourself, baby. Please."

She sniffed once, then rested her chin on my chest, staring into my eyes as she contemplated. I stared back, drowning in her gaze.

"Okay," Jihyo whispered. I smiled and watched her face light up. I suddenly grabbed her and lifted her up as I sat, trying to make the mood a little more playful. She screeched and slapped my arm until I had her safely on the ground. Her face was red, but she was smiling and giggling happily. I was still sitting down on the edge of the bed, and she was standing right in front of me, waiting for me to get up. I wrapped my arms around her waist and buried my face in her stomach. She patted my head.

"C'mon. I think we have pancake mix in the cabinet," she said. I quickly kissed her stomach before letting go of her and pushing myself up. She grabbed my wrist and dragged me along, pushing open the door and walking to the kitchen. To our surprise, Momo was attempting to cook something on the stove while Dahyun was crouching at least five feet away, shielding herself with three pots and a frying pan. A bowl full of water sat on the floor next to her.

"Oh god." Jihyo let go of my wrist. "I'm getting the fire extinguisher." She walked off. I couldn't tell if she was kidding.

She wasn't. Thirty seconds later she showed up with the fire extinguisher held out in front of her defensively, as if Momo would shoot fire in her general direction. I had stationed myself by the sink, trying to stay close to a water source in case Momo blew something up, not exactly something outside the realm of possibility.

Jihyo joined me by the sink, her hand resting on the pin of the fire extinguisher. I put an arm around her shoulder and watched as Momo finished her dish without causing a major disaster. Jihyo and I both sighed in relief and Dahyun got up and clapped, almost stepping in her bowl of water. Momo laughed at her before giving an exaggerated bow. I grabbed plates and utensils, and to my surprise, her food was actually pretty decent. I sat next to Jihyo, letting her feed me and rest on my shoulder. Across the table, Momo was trying to convince Dahyun to let her feed her, and Dahyun kept pouting about how she was an adult and could feed herself before ultimately giving in.

Jeongyeon and Mina came next, mumbling about how their girlfriends could never get up on time. Jihyo rested the side of her head on my chest and whispered "thank you."

"For what," I whispered back.

She nuzzled into my neck a little more. "For staying by my side."

I smiled and put my arms around her. "You don't need to thank me."

A/N
oh god this chapter is a mess what am i doing
i only have one more week of school left so expect more frequent updates on both stories after that

thank y'all for reading!