Broken is Beautiful-Sterek

5

Stiles POV:

So after the weekend, when by quite fast but excruciatingly slowly, it's been a while since I've actually been around people and spoke to them like friends do other than those I live with. I mean, it's not like I believe they actually want to be my friend, but at least it'll make my days seem less lonely till they get fed up with the rumours and leave as Scott did.

I stroll into school, and everything is normal up until lunch when Derek's group appear almost as quickly as the bell goes like they actually want to spend as many seconds with me as they can...the way Derek put it, though, I can't help but think that they're only doing this out of pitty like he basically said they realised that the rumours were fake thus feeling that they owed me friendship. Sometimes I don't think I can go on anymore, it feels like the whole world is against me, and all hope of having any friends fades just as quick as the idea races through my mind. I guess I have to give it a shot though, after all, I agreed to hang out with Derek and his little group today, which is just great; I mean, with the weekend I've had, I don't feel like seeing people let alone interacting with them. I don't even have the energy to be present at the moment; it feels like all life and energy I ever had has been sucked out of me; I can't wait to hear the rumours about how I look like I'm on drugs or something since I know I look as dead as I feel.

The first period is about to start so I stroll into class early and head to the back, hopefully, everyone leaves me alone and they don't try to pick on me this period all I want to do is have some time to myself before I have to work up the energy to socialise. Oh but it appears life has other plans for me just as people start flooding the room I see the group of people I had hope to escape from and surely enough they see me as well. Derek's face lights up with pure joy and they all race over to me like eager puppies with a jolt in each racing step. The chairs surrounding me simultaneously get put to use as they box me in, the air feels claustrophobic, I can feel each of their bubbling excitement surrounding me, suffocating me. I can tell they're about to speak and it seems like all the energy I was lacking was just thrown into my body, before I understand what's happening I'm already in the hallway running. I'm running but where feeling eye on me like prey I rush to anywhere I can before I feel free. I need to feel free I can't stand being caged anymore there's too much, I'm suffocating, I can't I can't breathe.

Breathe can't breathe.

I can feel the cold solid ground beneath my shaking body.

Invisible wire around my neck, each breath the tighter it gets- I can't.

Breathe, I can't breathe.

Help

Help 

Please

help

Someone help

Can't...breathe

My necks red raw from trying to pull away from the wire I could feel around my neck. I know that nothing was there and trying to talk while having a panic attack was never a good idea but I couldn't help but give in to my impulses. Once again all the pent up energy I felt has faded away into the universe. I'm barely conscious, I can just about tell I'm in the forest, thumping footsteps get louder like a herd of elephants running towards me in a stampede. 

Just before the cold dark layer of sleep and exhaustion takes over I hear it, something that makes me want to reject all the sleep in the world. The soft, delicate and fond tone in his voice, it feels like the first thing to reach my soul in too many years, like a deserted dried garden experiencing mental rain for the first time. The rain soothes the plants, the soil and the plants might have a chance to be brought back to life, perhaps my soul has a chance to be brought back.

Sleep takes over with the thought... maybe I can finally feel alive even just once more.