Born This Way

Accepted

Well, this all started from past one year in my mind and it lead to destruction of mine and also of people who loved me.

I used to think it was abnormal and would blame myself for it, though it wasn't my mistake.

All these words came from Nirmohi's mind on pages of her dairy while she was writing.

Nirmohi was a sweet girl living with her parents, in her small world that revolved around her family and a friend named Bindu.

They were like family to each other, and were always together specifically during their hardships; like during Bindu's parent's divorce and also during accident of Nirmohi's mother.

But from past few days they were quarreling and this lead to a cold war between them.

Family members tried to find the reason but the reason was only known to Nirmohi.

Well the reason was that Nirmohi had started falling for Bindu, more than a friend and this thought was eating her up from inside.

She herself was not accepting it because that wasn't something she ever thought of.

Hence, she was fighting with Bindu so that their friendship would break and this conflict in her mind would also be resolved.

But in the end this was killing herself, she knew.

On 11th day Nirmohi received a message ' hey!' from Bindu.

Then at that time, she made up her mind and decided to speak about it to Bindu so she replied and ask her to meet at their place.

And the next day they met at the spot where they usually used to hangout and there Bindu didn't asked Nirmohi that what went wrong in their friendship.

She asked her what went wrong within her that led her to take this action.

This made Nirmohi cry. She grasped bindu's hand and said "Bindu, I love u".

Well Bindu said casually, "oh, love u too".

Nirmohi looked up into her eyes and said "but more than a friend Bindu I am attracted to you".

Listening to this Bindu took a deep breath and said, by looking straight into the eyes of Nirmohi "well, I don't feel any thing for you in that manner, sorry."

Listening to these words of her bestfriend Nirmohi broke into tears saying " who will accept me now, I can't take this any more!"

Hearing these words, bindu couldn't control her laughter and said "first time"

Angrily she asked "what first time?"

Bindu said "rejection dear, well u remember I reacted the same way when saurabh rejected me.

How can u forget this you were the only one, all by my side, now don't be like this okay "

Nirmohi said "I remember but the situation is different he was a boy but now it's a girl!"

She replied "well, it is same because its about love, confession and rejection. "

Saying so she grasped Nirmohi at her arms looking into her eyes she said "don't take gender in between its about love "

She was able to read infinite questions in Nirmohi eyes.

She further continued "Niru accept yourself first and you should give time to others to accept it and not the capacity to take decision of deciding its right or wrong. Well I will always be with you".

So on that day I decided to accept myself and realised that Bindu is a human who's priority is humanity and yes she is more than a friend, she is my spine.

And at the end of page she wrote "ACCEPTED"!

And went to bed and fell asleep with great relief.

-Saylee Phatak