Derek once mentioned an old, abandoned wine distillery. He said it so casually that Charlie would have never thought much of it had he not stiffened after the admission. She tried to get him to talk to her about it but he shrugged it off so she dropped the subject. Now, though, she gives over to her instincts and her instincts tell her that he's hiding out there. This means confronting the one person she would rather not be alone with.
Every time she walks into Derek's loft, Charlie is very aware of the scent of blood in the air. This time it mixes with the stale smell of wet floorboards and the whispers of Boyd's death. She steers her body forward in an attempt to ignore what's happening around her.
"Well, if it isn't the sleeping beauty," Peter says from the spiral staircase.
Charlie keeps her face expressionless as she turns to face the werewolf. "I'm looking for Derek."
"You and everyone else, sweetheart."
"Do you remember an old wine distillery?"
"Does the little blonde think she can find my nephew?"
Charlie glares at him. "Fine. I'll find it myself."
She's almost to the door when he cuts her off. Charlie's expression shifts from anger to annoyance. She crosses her arms over her chest and sighs. Peter smirks.
"Go five miles northeast of the Hale house. You can't miss it."
Charlie stalks past the werewolf, ramming her shoulder against his body. She ignores his mocking laugh and heads for the exit. Three days ago she received a text from Stiles informing her that Derek is still MIA after what happened with Boyd. Her initial response had been to let Derek work out his grief on his own but when hours turned into days she decided it's time to find him.
Her first stop had been to Deaton but the vet knew nothing about the location of the distillery which left her with no other option but to go to Peter. Surprisingly, the devious wolf was helpful.
It's been several months since she last visited the Hale house. After her first visit, she never had any interest in returning and her visit now sparked nothing but bad memories. She blocks out the frightened whispers echoing from the house and fishes out her phone to map her course.
It takes her two hours to push her way through tangled tree branches and pull herself free of barbed bushes. By the time she reaches the distillery, there are random bits of twigs and leaves clinging to her hair and clothes. She barely notices this. Instead her eyes settle on the spiral that's clawed into the metal walls of the building. She walks towards it and gently brushes her fingers against the mark. Flashes of anger and grief surge through her and it takes her a moment to realize that these emotions are coming from the mark. Did Derek do this?
It takes most of her strength to slide the door open to the building. She cringes at the loud creeks and groans it emits. If Derek didn't know she was there before, he knows now. She walks towards the center of the distillery and looks around.
Normally when she meets Derek in a dark place, he's hiding in the shadows and watching her. Not this time. No, this time he sits on a stack of hay about ten feet to her right. He stares down at the floor with his shoulders slumped over. She can't see his face from where she stands but she doesn't need to, to know what he's feeling.
Charlie allows her feet to carry her over to him. He doesn't move or acknowledge that he senses her. Not even when she kneels in front of him so that she's staring up into his heart breakingly sad and dejected eyes. He stares straight ahead at his hands that are clasped together. She closes her hands over his as well as she can and he flinches.
"Derek," she whispers. He closes his eyes and tilts his face away from her. Charlie shakes her head before placing his hands on either side of his head. She turns his face towards her and presses her lips against his forehead. He takes a deep, shaky breath.
"It's not okay," she says gently and his jaw clenches against a fresh wave of guilt. "What happened is not okay. It never will be."
Derek opens his eyes. The green irises swim with unshed tears. Charlie wraps her arms around his torso and he buries his head deep into her neck. His body shakes against her as he digs his fingers into her back.
There is nothing she can say to comfort him. He will never forget that it was his claws that killed Boyd and it certainly won't matter that his beta was dropped onto them. Not to him. It doesn't matter that it was the alphas because it wasn't their hands that drained the light from Boyd's eyes.
"You shouldn't be here," Derek says after several minutes.
Charlie pulls away just enough to stare up at him. "Where else would I be?"
"Home. Where you're safe from me."
"Derek, there's no place safe in Beacon Hills. There's no one who is safe."
Derek presses his forehead against hers. "They told me you were poisoned."
"By the darach and because I know her name," she says. "Not by the alphas."
"Do you know what the color of my eyes really are?" He asks. Charlie shakes her head. "They're blue."
She suspected as much. Derek isn't a cold blooded killer but a person doesn't become as tortured and guarded as he is without having a heavy burden to carry. There's no heavier burden than taking a life.
"Who was it?"
"A girl. Her name was Paige. She... I... I was..."
Charlie smiles gently. "You were in love."
"She was bitten by Ennis because I thought we could truly be together if she was like me. We were fifteen. I... I didn't realize what I was doing." Derek closes his eyes and she knows what he's about to tell her. It happens rarely but it does happen. "She rejected the bite. She was in so much pain and she asked... She begged me to make it stop."
And so he did. This is the moment that marked Derek's soul with a never fading darkness. This is the moment that led him into the arms of Kate Argent-- the woman who murdered most of his family. This is what shaped him into the man he is today-- the man he is still evolving into.
Charlie presses her lips to his forehead once again. She feels his pain as though it were her own. "Derek Hale, you are a good person with a tragic past. It's your tragedies that's made you into the man you are today. They made you into the man that I fell in love with."
Derek's eyes snap up to hers. It's the first time she's uttered those words. Were he a stronger man, he would push her away and tell her she can't love him but he's not that strong. Not when it comes to the blonde kneeling in front of him. So, he gives into his weakness and pulls her lips against his.
This kiss is different. It's filled with the pain and loss both have felt for the other. It's filled with relief and desperation. He needs to taste her-- to know that she's here in this moment. And most of all, he needs the comfort her touch gives him.
A/N: So, it's short but I meant for it to be. This is mainly filler but I hope there's a lot in here to make up for that. I'm also hoping there's enough here to make you guys not hate me when I say that Charlie and Derek aren't exactly back together.
Hehe. So, I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter!!
