TIME FOLLOWS ME

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR THE TREE THAT CAST NO SHADE

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

THE TREE THAT CAST NO SHADE /

LEAVING THE BELLY OF THE BEAST

"So, you want to stay in Boonville with Mary Beth, Bob and the rest of the crowd?"

"Yes, I think so."

"You think this is as far as you want to go?"

"No."

"Is Reverend Sun Myng Moon the second coming of Jesus?

"You tell me, I'm straining here to get an answer."

"You know the answer already."

"No he's not."

"Then what are you waiting for?"

"I thought there might be more of a sign.

I was hoping for at least a burning bush."

"I don't do that anymore."

"Oh, I thought this tree might do, you don't have to burn it down, maybe just sparks or a small flame from the end of a branch."

"Now you're being ridiculous."

"I think you may have been chanting too long under the hot sun, on a diet of rice and veggies and no protein."

"So, no sign?"

"Uhn, uhunnna."

~~~

Sunday night was the time the Elephant Bus was leaving taking the weekend throng back to San Francisco. I had told Bob that I would be leaving and also Mary Beth. Bob said, "We would talk." Mary Beth asked, "What are your reasons for leaving?"

"I need to get back to my parents and tell them about this place."

"If you go back, they won't let you come again," said Mary Beth.

"I will come back, I promise you. I also want to finish high school and I'll be done in six months, and then I will come back."

I walked around all afternoon in a daze feeling very quiet. I dreaded saying goodbye to Mary Beth and didn't know if I could do it. Darkness slowly descended over the hills, the sun sinking like a bleeding rose. Bob was with me at all times trying to persuade me to stay. Near the departure time he asked me, " Do you want to see if I can get Mary Beth to come over so you can talk to her before you make a final decision and get on the bus?"

"Yes."

There were a lot of people hanging around, some quite sad looking. Others had a fixed smile on their faces that seemed to speak, "This is all part of the great wheel of life." The bus was getting ready to leave and I was looking desperately for Mary Beth in the gathering dusk. I saw her approaching and she reached out and held my hand. We drew closer and hugged. I think this was the first time that we had been this close. I could feel her body and the touch of her hair on my shoulder.

She said, "You can't leave."

"No, but I must. I will come back for you."

"You won't come back if you leave."

I looked straight into her dark piercing eye; my floodgates opened. I cried and sobbed. I could not help myself, I wept like a baby while Mary Beth held me in her hands. My whole body shook, my face wet with tears that ran down and caught in my straggly beard.

Mary Beth was shaken, but her faith seemed to support her. She still looked strong within her thin frame and peasant hippy clothing. I tore myself away and boarded The Elephant Bus entering again the belly of the beast, exiting the same way I came in. The ride back to the city was very subdued. No singing of songs this time. It was getting late, close to midnight I figured when we would arrive back in the city.

I wondered for the first time where I would sleep that night. I asked Bob if I could sleep in one of the houses/mansions and leave in the morning. He looked at me and said, "No, that is the rule."

I said, "Ask one of the leaders if I could?"

He said, "Ok," and went to the front of the bus and talked to the guy, family member who was in charge.

The guy said, "No", and I watched him say it.

"So this is how they really treat family members," I said in my head feeling slightly amazed.

I felt as if a door had literally been slammed in my face. I looked over to the leader and actually smiled. I felt numb like what a limb must feel like after being severed from a body. I pictured myself sleeping on a park bench that night clutching my knapsack.

Another guy who I didn't know, a complete stranger was also leaving the farm after a weekend visit said, "You can stay at my place. I have a small apartment and I'll stay at my friend's apartment tonight."

Midnight came and went like a thief.

I thanked him and spent the night alone for the first time in quite awhile, in this artfully decorated cozy place. In the morning the kind stranger appeared and I left after thanking him again. I walked out into the crowded street and joined the stream.