Shraman Songs Series (SSS)

Shayad

Dedicated to - kshvim

Situation- Shravan going from tiwari killa as promised when she will be fine he will move out after her accident.

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Suman looked at his retrieving figure while standing among all her family member, still feeling left out just because he is not there by her side to celebrate her happy moments.

His feet stopped, his body turned involuntary and eyes searched a pair of eyes and landed on hers. He is taking a last glance, don't know when he will see her again with that brightest smile that is lingering on her face right now. His heart skipped a beat when he realised it is because of him. He did something worth remembering at last.

Shayad kabhi na
Keh sakoon main tumko
Kahe bina samajh lo tum shayad
Shayad mere khayal mein tum ik din
Milo mujhe kahin pe ghum shayad

( I may never be able to say this to you 
So please understand without me saying it
May be one day in my memories 
You'll come and meet me somewhere )

Maybe its true, he will never be able to say those magical words to her because of circumstances and may be because of his insecurities but perhaps she can understand by the way his pupils dilates ever time he looks at her. Maybe she will come and meet him in his memories, just like she does in his dreams every other day.

Joh tum na ho rahenge hum nahi
Joh tum na ho rahenge hum nahi
Na chahiye kuch tumse zyada,
tumse kam nahi

( I won't be able to live without you 
I won't be able to live without you
I don't want anything more than you,
neither less than you )

He is damn sure about it that he won't be able to live without her. He wants her by his side forever nothing else. Because only she has the ability to light up his dull life. His life meant something to him when he is around her.

Joh tum na ho toh hum bhi hum nahi
Joh tum na ho toh hum bhi hum nahi
Na chahiye kuch tumse zyada,
tumse kam nahi

( I'm not myself without you 
I'm not myself without you
I don't want anything more than you,
neither less than you )

He won't live when she is not there to laugh with him. He won't live when she is not there to tease him. He won't live when she is not there to tell him her secrets. He won't live when she is not there when his hair will get gray. He won't live when she is not there to hold him close.

Aankhon ko khwaab dena
khud hi sawaal karke
Khud hi jawaab dena teri taraf see

( Give my eyes dreams by 
asking a question 
And you yourself give the answer 
from your side )

She gave him so many hopes by asking him questions like "kya tumhe mujhpar bharosa hai?" "Kya tum mujhe sach mai miss karte ho?" But then she gave all the answers by telling him "Maine mangi tumhari help? Mai apna dhyaan kud rakh sakti hun"

May be this is what he deserve for leaving her on the road knowing something can happen and it did eventually. It was his biggest mistake.

Bin kaam kaam karna,
jaana kahin ho chahe
Har baar hi guzarna teri taraf see

( I do useless things and
if I have to go somewhere 
Then I always pass from your side )

He always does pretend to be engrossed in his work even if does not have any. And when ever he is confused or mad about something, his feet takes him to only one place and that is hers. She is like a home to him.

He looked at the iron rusted gates outside and sighed.

Yeh koshishein toh hongi kam nahi
Yeh koshishein toh hongi kam nahi

( These attempts won't reduce 
These attempts won't reduce )

He smiled and thought what if she does not love him. He does and thats a big deal for him. He won't stop doing whatever he wants to do for her, even if she does not want. He will try his best to make her life easier without letting her know.

Joh tum na ho rahenge hum nahi
Joh tum na ho toh hum bhi hum nahi
Na chahiye kuch tumse zyada,
tumse kam nahi

( I won't be able to live without you 
I'm not myself without you
I don't want anything more than you,
neither less than you )

He is not going to promise stars and moon instead he is going to promise what he has, love and only love which would last till eternity. He wants to breathe in her, for her and with her. That is all he wants.

Joh tum na ho..
Joh tum na ho..
Joh tum na ho..

(Without you
Without you
Without you)

When he look for himself inside the hollow of his chest, he finds her portrait residing there. He can't stand away a moment without her because whenever he smiles, she takes shelter on his lips.

"Meri banai hui daal khaye bina hi ja rahe ho?"

When he heard her, his lips went upwards. The way her voice came he knew she is smiling too.

He turned and saw her coming toward him.

"Sumo i

He stopped as he did not know what to say. They can't be cordial all of a sudden after all that happened between them.

"Shh. Kuch mat bolo bas come and have it with me."

"Daal" he said with an uninterested face

"Sumo special hai baba. I made it mine as you have suggested me" she gave him a smile

"Phir to banta hai" he smiled and both went in with those smiling faces.

Perhaps both will have a good sleep tonight. Because those smile should bloom forever, if not before each other then in each other's heart but it should bloom.

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I hope you guys like it :)

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