Fix me

Rainy Night

12:25

I was scrolling threw our photos together, then it hit me when was the last time I called him or texted him.

My Dad is my world, why didn't I do those things.. I wasn't even aware that he wasn't doing well, I would've left earlier to spend time with him, hugged him a little longer and told him how much I loved him. Hell It kills me that I didn't get to say I love you one last time and say one last goodbye.

Thinking these things put a toll on me, I just couldn't help it, couldn't help think the things I should have done.

I slowly got out of bed away from Soojin. I put my hoodie on and slipped my shoes on. My feelings were too much to bear any longer.

I slowly walked out of my room and opened the front door.

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Sitting on the rooftop my tears fell one after another with the rain pouring on me

guess we were both crying tonight I thought

I look up at the sky letting the rain hit my face, clinching my chest tighter and finally cried even harder "I'm sorry I wasn't there"

As a minutes passed. It was getting colder and I was completely drenched. I wiped my face and headed back inside, I walked down the stairs and took a deep breath before I reached our floor "I'm Ok" I mumbled.Walking to the front of the door

I turned the nob slowly opening the door again, it creaked a little so I quickly went inside and shut it

I turned around and notice a figure sitting on the couch

"What the" I questioned

I looked down and notice I created a little puddle from my shoes, I'll have to clean that later

"Where did you go"

why is she up "just let me be" I sighed

"I told you, I wouldn't leave you" soojin whispered

My heart started to beat fast again "You keep saying that" but you weren't there a few minutes ago I thought

Soojin walked closer "I will keep saying it"

"I'm Ok" I breathed out again

"It's ok to not be ok" she sincerely said holding onto Shuhuas shoulders

I was taken aback by her words.. "it's ok to not be ok" I mumbled was it really I thought

I felt her hands go around my neck as she pulled me into a tight hug "you don't care that I'm soaked"

She calmly said "I should, just get changed and let's go back to bed it's late"

She felt warm

I let go of the hug and simply walked back to my room. Of course she followed me.

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1:16

I knew she left the dorm when I heard the door open and when she wasn't beside me anymore. I won't ask for the reason that's why I waited for her to come back.

Im worried for her.. this situation was completely different from the rest, we got closer when we talked about our problems but this one.. she won't say anything to me or the other members. I got out of my thoughts when the restroom door opened

Shuhua walked out wearing a sports bra and basketball shorts.

"Your starring" Shuhua said walking to the bed to sit down

My face got warm so I quickly looked away "whatever" I mumbled

thinking of what to say, I'm not use to initiating conversations first, so we sat on the bed quietly
Listening to the rain.

I stretched my arms "So~"

"my flight tomorrow is at 6:30 in the morning" Shuhua bluntly said

I placed my hand on my chin and nodded "what day do you come back"

Shuhua sighed again "next week on Thursday, but I doubt that will happen"

Shuhua got off the bed and motioned soojin to get off too, she then turned the light off and got under the covers with soojin following again.

"Don't ask me any other questions" she said as she faced the other way

I tapped on her shoulder "can we cuddle"

"That's another question" she mumbled

I laid in bed and wrapped my arms around her "I don't care" I smiled. She tried to move away but I held my grip.

Shuhua finally let me hold her after a few second of fighting it. I pulled her closer "I'm going to miss you" I whispered.

Shuhua held my hand and didn't say anything back.She didn't have to say it back I already knew.

Shu was the first to fall asleep and as for me I stayed up a little longer texting the members to wake up at 5:20 in the morning to drop Shuhua off to the airport. Was she really planning on leaving without saying a word to us I thought. Before I could think anymore I felt my eyes go heavy as I listened to the rain pour a little harder this night.

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Bc of 1k reads here is another chapter!!

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Also Tuesday and Wednesday will be the days I most likely post on.

Stay safe humans💛