Anxceit - A toxic love story

Nothing's wrong!

Virgil POV

Thomas doesn't need me right now, I was just scared. I know it's for the best but they still hurt like hell. I go to my room to get my purple patch hoodie like usual, and disappear to the light side. The cuts are still bleeding, but my hoodies thick and the blood doesn't soak through. When I get to the light side Logan, Patton and especially Roman smile at me.
"Hey Virge!" Roman says enthusiastically, and I think back to what Janus said earlier. Does Roman really like me? Why? He always acts like he hates me, teasing back and- Oh no. Does he think I like him too? Shit that wasn't flirting was it? Did he think it was? I panic. If he really does like me, I should take my hoodie off, to show him Janus's name in my skin. But then Patton will panic, and they'll all try to talk to Janus, and then he'll get mad. I can't risk that. Should I ask Roman about it? I don't want to reject him...

"Virgil? Are you okay?" I hear Patton.
"Hm? Oh yeah." I snap out of my fearful spiral.
"Really... Cause you seem a bit tense, is something wrong?"
"Nothings wrong!" I snap, and regret it immediately when I see Patton's face, "I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap. I just... Don't want to talk about it."
"Is it the dark side? You know, with your room still being there? I don't know what's going on with the mindpalace, it should have adjusted by now."
The mindpalace has adjusted, my room is actually next to Roman's. Nobody's noticed though, I lie to them saying it's still at the dark side so I have an excuse to stay with Janus. Well... More so Janus told them while pretending to be me, but it was all in good nature, he knows I'm not good at lying without his help. Roman seems a bit suspicious. Does he know my room moved? Does he know I'm lying? I really hope not...

A couple hours pass while hanging out with the light sides, laughing and joking and just having a good time. I feel myself calm down with them, and I stop worrying about Janus until my phone starts blowing up.

Janus 💛: Where are you
Janus 💛: Why aren't you back yet?
Janus 💛: Come back
Janus 💛: You're not cheating on me again are you?!

This hurts me. He still thinks that?

Me: Hey babe, sorry, lost track of time with the lights, we were just going to start playing a game xx
Janus 💛: Come. Back. Now.
Me: Why? Are you hurt? Xx
Janus 💛: No but you're going to be.

Uh oh. What did I do? I didn't actually cheat on him, so what is he mad about? I stare at my phone and gulp. Patton looks over and I hide my phone quickly. 
"Kiddo? Are you okay?" Patton asks concerned. I want to tell him everything that's wrong, that Janus carved his name into my skin to make sure I wasn't cheating on him, that hes threatening to hurt me, that I feel... In danger when I'm around him. But I can't.
"Oh yeah, sorry I'm fine, so what are we playing?"
Patton, Logan and Roman get distracted in a little argument while trying to decide what game we'll play and my phone pings again.

Janus 💛: If you don't come back now, I'm going to know for sure you're cheating on me and we're over.

N-no. I don't want Janus to break up with me. It's not the first time hes threatened it, but this could be the first time he follows through with it. I take a breath, my whole body shaking.

Me: No I'm not cheating on you! I'll come back, see you soon 💖

I get up quickly "Hey, sorry guys, can't stay, just remembered I've got something to do."
"Oh are you sure?" Roman seems sad, disappointed.
"Yeah, sorry, I'll see you guys." I dash off, already thinking the worst.

Janus hates you. You're a mess. No way Roman likes you, you're pathetic. Janus should just leave you, it's a wonder he ever went out with you in the first place. Janus is going to break up with you. Don't know what you did but you fucked something up.

I get to outside his room, biting what's still left of my nails. There are dark grey clouds surrounding Janus's door and along the walls. He's mad. I take a deep breath, plaster on a smile, and open the door.