Spotlight Oblivion

CHAPTER 10

Friends are somewhat like rare gems that are hard to find, and when they are found, they sure are worth the keep.

Sa panahong naglipana ang mga mapagkunwari, napakahirap makahanap ng totoong kaibigan. That one friend who would lend shelter whenever you're lost. That someone who would listen to your endless whimsical rants; who would never tire to hold your hand, caress your back, wipe your tears, and accept you despite all your flaws. That someone who wouldn't tolerate your mistakes, but would help you grow and fonder instead.

Noong sandaling iniwan kami ni papa, napakaraming nagbago, pati ako. I have changed. If it was for the better or for the worse, that I wasn't sure of, but the latter's more likely. Gone was the cheerful Corry they knew. Gone was the optimistic child whose bright smiles never seem to fade.

When dark clouds were summoned and everything that I held so dear became just another nightmare, I found myself on the corner far from everyone, building barriers against them. I found it hard to open up myself to anyone, but Frangels, like a plot twist, came crushing everything that I put up.

Unti-unti, muli kong nahagilap ang pagtitiwala sa iba.

And now that she entered my life, I can't let her out just like that. I won't let go of her. I would hold tight to everything that's left in our friendship, even if it would mean leaving scratches in me.

"Hello, tita?" I said as I roamed my eyes around the four corners of the room. The room was empty and clean. Ang kumot at unan ay maayos na nakapatong sa ibabaw ng kama.

"Nak, Corry. Nakauwi na kami kanina," I heard her say. I went out and positioned myself on one of the benches. "Pasensiya na't hindi ko agad nasabi sa'yo. I was going to tell you pero tumawag ka na."

"It's okay, tita," I assured her. "How is she..." maingat na tanong ko. Narinig ko siyang bumuntonghininga. I slightly bit my nails while waiting for her response.

"She's fine, pero nagkukulong pa rin sa kwarto," ramdam ko ang lungkot sa boses niya kaya hindi ko na rin maiwasang malungkot. What happened back then still kept on flashing in my mind. Hanggang ngayo'y malinaw pa rin sa pandinig ko ang hinanakit sa boses niya.

I went to visit her this morning in hopes that she would finally give me a chance to explain myself and listen to me. Pero nakalabas na pala siya kani-kanina lang.

Pero naiintindihan ko naman siya, kung saan nanggagaling ang galit at tampo niya. Mahirap tanggapin na wala 'yong taong akala mo'y masasandalan mo sa panahong may pinagdadaaanan ka.

I understand that she must have been traumatized with what she experienced. Sabi ni tita ay nadamay lamang siya. I just hope that she'll be fine. It may not be now, but soon.

"Sige, tita," malungkot na ani ko.

"Alam kong gusto mo na siyang kausapin, pero bigyan mo munas siya ng oras, nak, ha? Sigurado akong nabigla lang siya," sabi niya sa malumanay na boses, puno ng pagpapaintindi. "Sana'y habaan mo pa ang pang-unawa para sa kaniya." Tumango-tango ako na para bang makikita niya ito sa kabilang linya.

Mahirap man maghintay nang walang kasiguraduhan, maghihintay ako.

I went straight to the mall to refresh my mind. Dumiretso ako sa bookstore nang makasalubong si Raven. Sinamahan niya akong maglibot-libot. I wansn't really planning to buy anything. Gusto ko lang maglibang. As usual, with him, pinuno niya ako ng asar at tawa. I was glad though. Dahil talaga nga namang nakakahawa ang mga tawa niya. Bahagyang gumaan ang mabigat na pakiramdam ko.

He then asked me out for lunch. At dahil wala rin naman akong gagawin, pumayag na rin ako sa invitation niya. If I didn't, I knew I would just fill my head with drowning thoughts, at ayaw ko nang ganoon. I won't let those thoughts win over me. It's my head; therefore I should be the one ruling it.