Dear Diary,
Gosh that sounds soo formal. Anyway I've begun something that I don't think I can stop, I've began to cut. Nobody knows, not my parents, friends, teachers, nobody. I feel so guilty each time I do it, but it relieves the pain I have, the hollowness that's always in my body, I needed to feel something even if it was just pain. I actually have an excuse to wear long sleeves; winter. Loneliness is a bitch, it never leaves you, it follows you everywhere. Whether it's a crowd, or a small coffee shope, I feel alone wherever I go. I once watched a video on YouTube, this girl was sexually abused, and she'd cut plus to add onto the burden she made herself aneroxic. I remembered on one of the cards she'd wrote it said;
"It's amazing what long sleeves and a fake smile can hide." I can now finally relate to her statement, and I'm not proud that I can.
I'd found my Grandma's diary a few days ago, and I'd found out that she was depressed. I remembered reading an article where if a relative had depression you had a ⅔ chance of getting it. That made me think, I looked up all the symptoms and sure enough I had some of them. Lately I've been listening to Black Veil Brides, Ed Sheeran, and One Direction. I don't exactly know why I've suddenly started listening to BVB, but I found out they're really good, especially their song In The End.
I've got to go, I'll write soon, hopefully tomorrow. ~A.J.
YOU ARE READING
Dear Diary
RandomShe likes to paint with a brush and a canvas, although nobody knows that her brush is a blade, and her canvas is her wrist. I am that girl. The girl who likes to paint with her blade and wrist, the girl who's too quiet to get help, the girl whom f...
