Inhaling Alongside You✔️

Chapter Six: If Only He Knew

When do you know you;re in love? Do you know it when his jokes become enticingly funnier? Do you know when shared kisses are more passionate? Do you know when secrets that are foretold become darker and well worth keeping? How can you tell you're in love? How can differentiate love and a mirage?

These are the questions that monarchs my train of thought. Everyday I spend with Michael only induces more of these questions. It's not that I'm questioning my love for Michael, but I'm asking myself, am I truly in love. I sometimes often daydream about the day Michael will ask my hand in marriage. I imagine saying yes, and then the vision blurs into fast forward, into our future. But, before the daydream ends, something wedges our happiness, more so, someone.

After Michael's meet and greet, Michael decided he wanted to turn down the pre-release party, and just return to our hotel room. I figured that he wanted to return to our suite because he knows if we go out, I would have to trail behind.

I hate this so much. It makes me feel guilty at times. Michael sacrifices a piece of morality, just to make sure I don't feel left out. I appreciate his caring nature, but I do fear he's going to eventually grow tired of sacrificing for me.

We've just arrived to The Double Tree Hotel, through the back way of course. I've taken notice that Michael and Bill haven't said a word to each other since we've departed Barnes and Nobel. I'm afraid that has something to do with me, it always does. I'm just bad luck.

As we wait to be cleared, I steal quick glances from Michael. He looks peeved, but each time I steal a glance, je forces a faulty smile and looks ahead. After the third glance, I gave up trying.

Finally Bill opens Michael side of the door, his facial expression resembling Michael's, with an exception of his additive of expression lines on his forehead.

"Come on" He simply instructs.

Michael obeys, still glaring at Bill.

I follow suite, avoiding Bill all together.

Upon taking our secret route to return to our suites, Michael falls behind to talk to Bill. By the sounds of it as I walk alongside Scotty, I inferred that it isn't a pleasant one. I can hear their low scowls, Michael feeling very strong about what ever it is they are arguing about. I try to turn to listen, but Sotty quickly redirects me forwards,

"It's bad enough that they are arguing about you. You don't want to make it worse" He whispers, guiding me into the elevator. Just as the elevator doors were closing, a huffing and puffing Michael, forces himself through the doors.

Without question, I steal his hand and give it a light squeeze.

Within ten seconds, we are on our suite level and everyone is returning to their designated rooms, everyone except Michael.

"Babygirl you go inside. I need to talk to Bill" He instructs, not even looking me in the eye.

I release his had and begin walking towards the door, only stopping to back at Michael. I'm hoping he will glance back as well, but he doesn't. Sighing, I swipe the room key, and slowly enter the bedroom, closing the door just as Bill exits the elevator.

Michael enters our suite ten minutes later, still clearly bothered by another round of heated words with Bill.

I stand from my spot on the love seat, watching him as he enters the kitchen corner for a beverage. I can't even construe the guilt in my heart, witnessing Michael argue with the only true father he's ever known, because of me.

"Michael?" I whisper aloud, as he proceeds towards our suites bedroom.

"I'm tired. Goodnight" He simply croaks, disappearing into the bedroom.