To Win The Game

12: I Can't really Say

"both of you stand down," Erwin called sternly as he stood up behind his desk.

Levi clenched his uninjured hand again as he replaced his mask and stepped back away from me, turning to instead face Erwin with closed eyes as if he didn't want to see the disappointed glint in the man's blue gaze.

instead of looking at Levi in disappointment though he was looking at me in disapproval.

"no one said anything about torture Ayano," Erwin said as he straightened out his stance before sitting back down.

"now please, let us continue our conversation civilly," he indicated back to the chair I had been sitting in before.

I wrinkled my nose in distaste. 

glancing at the door beside me I wondered briefly if I could get out and away without much fuss, but a glance back at the Ackerman's suspicious gaze made me sigh in defeat.

 practically throwing myself back into the seat I slouched down and crossed my arms like a defiant teenager as I glared at the blond man before me.

"I believe we can come to an agreement here Ayano. I do not believe you are here to harm anyone given the fact that you have had plenty of opportunities and haven't so much as lifted a finger against any one of us," Erwin stated as he leaned back in his chair as well.

I could hear Levi moving around behind me, making me tense slightly as I glanced back at him with narrowed eyes.

he was leaning against the wall directly behind me, his resting bitch glare burning a hole through the chair into the back of my head.

I glared back at him before turning to Erwin and saying "honestly I don't give a shit about any of you."

Erwin nodded as he said, "as you have said before, but I believe that is false."

I said nothing as I shifted to rest my elbow on the armrest again, leaning my chin onto my closed fist as I finally asked in a clearly bored tone "oh yeah? how do you figure that?"

Erwin's eyes flickered to Levi, specifically his fingers as he said "you checked over all of Levi's squad after the fighting, even going so far as to personally bandage Levi's fingers when you saw he was hurt."

I hummed in acknowledgment of his deduction while thinking quickly of some way to rebuke what he had said.

sighing I decided to go with some semblance of the truth "Alright, I do give a shit about Yu. As for the rest of Levi's squad, all I can say is that they are necessary."

Erwin interlaced his fingers again as he leaned forward into them.

"Necessary, you say," he hummed thoughtfully.

I could hear Levi moving again and looked up to see he had pushed off of the wall and was walking towards me.

he stopped just behind my chair and leaned over the back of it to glare down at me as he asked: "necessary for what?"

I looked away from his cold glare and to the floor gritting my teeth.

I wanted to tell him that it wasn't them, but their deaths that were necessary.

if they don't die when they are supposed to, then later Eren won't be able to slap himself out of his own head and save everyone.

"I can't tell you," I ground out.

I could almost feel the warmth that radiated off of petra's smile just this morning and felt sick to my stomach knowing that she will die in five years' time.