Pulse

Chapter 3

     "No, Briggs, you're not dead," I replied.
    "You look like an Angel." He looked at me for the first time straight in the eyes.
     "I'm no angel," I smirked, my lashes fluttering, feeling shy around him. His eyes never faltered or wavered from mine. He made me nervous but excited.
    "Anyways, can I get out of here?" He mumbled grumpily. His face fell, and he looked stressed and worried, unsure of how to take this all in.
     "I'll be right back," I asserted before I walked out. I maneuvered around nurses who were walking by. I asked at the desk if either one of the new patients could have a visitor or if they were well enough to come amd visit Briggs.
     She checked the guy's charts and then smiled at me. "Axl can move around. He's probably more portable than the other two. Briggs will need lots of help with his injured back and leg." She said softly.
    "Okay, thank you. I'm going to go see if Axl will go see Briggs."
    "How's he doing?" Sheila asked with concern nodding towards his door.
     "He's been through a lot, and he's taking it pretty hard," I spoke softly, low with sadness for these men.
    We both give each other an understanding nod like we can sympathize that these men have been through so much—things we can't even comprehend. I walked off and slipped into Axl's room. He looked at me when I entered. "Hey beautiful, are you lost?" His rough, husky voice vibrated deep from inside his chest. He was beautiful, but Briggs had this something I couldn't explain.
     Axl was the complete opposite of Briggs. Axl had a long dark beard and larger muscles, not by much, but he was bulkier. He looked run down and frail—these strong, fearless men looked ailing and destructible.
     "No." My cheeks were warm from his compliment.
     "Would you be up for seeing Briggs?" I asked.
    "Yeah, definitely." He seemed to brighten up even more.
     "Great, I'll grab you a wheelchair."
    "Nonsense. Just help me up, and I'll move my ass."
     I moved over to his bed and wrapped my arm around his waist. He was thin and fragile feeling. Yes, he looked like the most muscular man I have ever seen. He was all man, bulging muscles, battle scars, and years of worldly encounters and experience dimmed his eyes slightly, but he's trying to put on a front that he's ok. Sometimes we have to fake it until we make it.
     He stiffened and held me tighter. We strolled. He winced a bit, but he was determined to walk. We entered Briggs's room, and I guided him to the chair beside him. Briggs was asleep again. "Is he ok?" He looked over at me with concern.
    "He's alive, but he's hurting, not just physically," I said, delicate and quiet.
    "Briggs, wake the hell up." Axl patted his face and jarred him awake. This is obviously their personalities and how they are with each other.
    "Axl, hey, man." He smiled slightly when he saw Axl.
     I walked out, giving them space, but as I reached the door and heard Axl.
    "Fuck man, why did you get the most beautiful nurse? "I got stuck with Birtha's bad breath."
     I held in my laugh as I walked out.

Briggs

     "Hahaha, cause you suck." I snickered. It felt good for a moment to laugh.
     "So, are you going to tap that?" Axl beamed.
    "Fuck dude, she's not like that." She's definitely not just a quicky fuck and move along. That's all I am looking for, that is, if I can even fuck anymore."
     She did make me so fucking hard, so it must still work.
     "How do you know she's not a quick fuck?" Axl asked
     "Cause she's innocent and pure, unlike the chicks we usually end up with."
     "You're not even going to try?" He seemed surprised.
     "Nah, she's probably got a boyfriend waiting for her. The good ones are always taken."
     "She'd be a good fuck. Why don't you fuck her then?" After I said it, I kind of regretted it.
     "Cause you're right she not that kind of girl."
    "Then why do you think I could?" I inquired earnestly, wondering if he bumped his head.
     "Cause you need her more."
     "Why do you say that?"
     "Cause, man, I see good things for you, a girl by your side, maybe a family one day."
    "Did you hit your fucking head?" He must be high on medication.
    "No, well, maybe I did, but I am a completely of sound mind."
    "I ain't cut out for that shit. Girls don't want a man that's never around or a disabled person; look at me, I look like a monster."
     "Dude, don't do that to yourself. You look fine, man. There's someone out there that will be able to accept all of you."
     "Hahaha, now I think you either hit your head, or you are on some mighty good drugs that I need to be on." We both laughed for a moment, then reeled it in, easing off.
     "I'm serious. We never know what will happen, especially after this term. Get out there, man, put yourself out there." He seemed adamant about this.
      "I don't think I'm the setting down type, man. It's too hard, leaving and being apart. Never knowing when we will see each other. It never ends well."
     "Have more faith, man, this life is a gift, and we are not promised tomorrow. Take this next chapter and make something of your life. If you meet someone that makes you feel shit, go after it." Axl spoke like a salesman trying to get me to take this opportunity and live my life.
     I have never been a relationship kind of guy. Once I joined the military, I just focused on that and when I came home, having a quick hook up was all I could handle or wanted. Girls always wanted more, but I never took that next step.
     I've seen my dad do the same thing. My mom left us when I was five. She met someone else and decided we were not what she wanted anymore. So it has always just been me and my dad and his side of the family. He has, in time, let women in, but you can tell he's always worried.
     We have all entered the military, and that has just been the way of life. We keep our eyes open and our hearts closed off, never letting people in too close cause that way, nothing gets messy.
    I felt 100% safer with any of the men I serve than I do with any females. They're good for one thing. . . sex, and that's it. I've seen my dad and friends go through shit with a woman. They only break your hearts. They are all in, but they can't take the being apart, and then they cheat.
So no commitment means not getting hurt.
     My dad is on his 4th wife. She seems nice, but they all start nice then they switch overnight and become psycho. I just don't want to go through that shit.
     "So?" Axl brings me back from my drifted mind.
     "What did you say?" I invited him to tell me, but I didn't hear him.
     "So, will you give it a shot with the hot nurse?"
     "No, man." I shook my head.
     "You're stupid." He slapped my leg.
     "Fuck, man."
     "Just make sure you're all there cause you're being stupid." He shook his head at me.
     "Just leave me alone," I said, grumbling, just wanting to get the hell out of here.
     "Wake the fuck up, man, don't be pulled down. It's not a fun place."