I used to love sitting on the wet sand at the beach whilst the waves crashed against it. Something about the noise was so calming for me. The water is cold on my feet and I let out a small giggle. The beach is quiet and there's nobody around except me. I sit with my pen and paper writing down whatever comes to me. I'm starting to get somewhere
"I was so hung up on you Tell me what did I do? Waited and waited for ages, For you to tell me you didn't mean it"
I hum to myself thinking of how the tune could go, I am so peaceful right now I feel I could be dreaming. Every day since I was 7 I'd come here and just listen to the waves. Once the prettiest shell washed up and I kept it. I still have it do this day and I wear it around my neck, "my lucky necklace" I call it.
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Awhile ago I thought I'd lost it, but today I saw it sitting in my drawer and I was enthusiastic. Maybe it's a sign, maybe it's not. I really hope for it to be a sign that I will make it. Joe would be so proud of me.
Then it hits me. I had gone ages not thinking about him. Oh no oh no. It all starts hitting me like waves hitting the sand. Am I selfish for not thinking about him? Or would he want me to move on? Is it bad I forgot for a while? Or is it a good thing?
I bite my lip and close my eyes. Listen to the waves I repeat in my head. Listen.to.the.waves.
*crash* the water settles and again *crash* and the bubbles hit my feet.
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I tell myself that It's okay for me to move on. Slowly but surely I will. I am positive that Joe would have wanted me too. It's not like I don't care but I accepted it a long time ago and I don't think it's selfish for me to want to move on. Is it?
I pack up my things and head home to where my mum awaits me
"Hey honey" she says with a smile "Hi mum" I reply "Oh hon, how have you been doing? Come here." She pulls me in for a tight squeeze "O..kay.. mum I... I.. can't... breathe" I say achingly "Oh gosh sorry sweetie" she says as she pulls away and I let out a chuckle "I'm okay mum, really. I've just been at the beach writing some new songs" "That's great! I hear you're bringing out an album soon?" She smiles and squints her eyes "Yes that's correct. I know what you're think though and no it wont be too much pressure , I promise" I say assuring her that I will be fine. "Look at you! You are amazing, my wee girl all grown up!" She squeals and I blush. I can see the tears forming in her eyes and I hold her chin up and say "thank you for everything mum. I love you so much. Now don't cry! Smile!" I cheer and my mum laughs. We hug eachother and I go upstairs whilst she makes dinner.
