The Tattoo Guy Christmas Edition

Christmas Edition Part 1

*A/N: So as promised this is the first instalment of the Christmas Edition of The Tattoo Guy... I apologise for the first part (I'm a bit rocky with getting back into writing from Gerard's POV as I've been writing in Frank's for That Tattoo Guy and The Blind Artist so bear with me) Anyway have an awesome Christmas and Please join me in spreading the word through the Watty Awards by tweeting/sharing this story!- Love- Bec xx

Age 19

“Okay I think she’s wrapped up enough.” Ray tells me as I apply another layer to my daughter’s small wriggling frame, this time a thick woolly black hat to cover her already fleece cream one decorated in stars.

“Are you sure, I don’t want her to get sick y’know? Can babies get colds? Oh crap- what if she’s not warm enough and she just freezes and I don’t notice!?” I begin to panic a little, hugging her little body to my chest and smoothing down her flush cheek, it’s so smooth under my fingertip making me fear that I would break her.

“Chill, she’s fine. Can we just go- I’d like to have some turkey before the New Year?” Ray become impatient with me, we had planned to take a walk into the city to show me the new store he’d bought to start his tattoo studio business.

I grab the stroller and place Ivy inside amongst layers of wadding as she wiggles, and a small squeal escapes as we step out of the warmth of the small house onto the street. I cuddle into myself and Ray chuckles as he rubs his hands together. “Cold?” he raises a brow at the realisation of me worrying so much about Ivy than myself.

Walking through the streets of New Jersey Christmas coats every surface it can, decorations placed in every window and a wreath on every door, lights flickered and music filled every store with the gentle hum and buzz of love and laughter. I sigh at the sight of the true Jersey though; the thick grey sludge in the gutters left from ice and rain, the calls of commercialisation and the loss of excitement. When I was a kid I remember the way the snow used to fall and lay so softly, fluttering down and landing on my nose, I remember the glow of the streetlights as my father took me and Mikey into the city. We’d stand and watch as the marching band played tunes and carols that I was never shy to sing along to. Where are the kids now? At home watching TV.

“What’s your plan for Christmas this year, it’s your first time alone right?” Ray asks as he open the store front door, the lights flicker on as the room opens up into a purple themed reception area filled with black gothic looking couches and swirly black frames on the walls waiting for ink to fill them. Pulling Ivy inside Ray lifts her up and places her in the centre of the room on the fluffy black carpet as we take a seat on a nearby couch.

He was right, Christmas was less than 3 days away now and I was nervous, I hadn’t even decorated the tiny tree I had got and the only sign of a dinner I had was microwave mac and cheese. I don’t even know what to buy Ivy, I mean what do you buy for a 4 months old?

“I think it’ll be just me and V this year, she’s 4 months old so I doubt she’ll remember her first Christmas.” I try to shrug it off, the truth was that all I wanted was for her to have a nice Christmas, one that I would remember for the rest of my life and tell stories about when she was older. I just dreamed so big sometimes I lost sight of what was real, I couldn’t make this big feast with set games to play and movies to watch together, I couldn’t expect to get a gift from her or her to even open her present. It wasn’t real, not when it was just me and her. I bet Elena would know what to do, she’d guide me through it whilst reminding me that we didn’t need Lyndsay; we had each other. But that was all in my head.