Music in my heart

Past Is Past

Song for this chapter:

Two worlds collide by Demi Lovato

Chapter 13

Angel's POV.

We all stayed quiet waiting for Jane to share everything about her. We are all feel like we're going back in our past. I dont like this feeling. I dont like the idea that the boys suggested. Why is it needed for the boys to know about us? Isn't it enough that they knew we were going through too much in our lives? I don't know if I'm mad, sad or just dissapointed. I don't like it. I look at Troy who were staring at me the past few minutes we were in the rooftop. His eyes were filled with sadness and nervousness. I quickly look down and take a deep breath.

"It was 7 yrs ago when my sister died. She hanged herself inside her room. I was going to borrow a book to read 'coz I was bored that time and there I saw her hanging. I was crying so hard asking why she did it, why she killed herself and why did she leave me. I know shes going through a lot during her childhood and teen years. She was being bullied and people hurt her verbally and physically. I just dont understand why she did this. Am I not enough to make her feel better? I'm her sister and I love her. I'm always at her side.

After an hour of crying my parents just got home from their work and when they opened my older sister's bedroom...",Jane crying so hard.

"It's ok Jane. Shhh..",Austin comforted Jane and he hug the side of Jane who were crying really hard.

"My parents... they blame me for it. I dont know why but when they saw me in my sister's room with her... hanging they changed. They never talk to me. They always told me hurtful things. They blame me everything that happened to my sister. I told my mum and dad about what my older sister had been through in school and her everyday life, they will just slap me and kick me until I couldn't move anymore. Its really hurt knowing your own parents abused you.", Jane sob. "One time, I found out that I am a bipolar when an old woman which happened to be my neighbor took me with her in rehab. They give me treatments, care and all other things they thought I need. I was acting really... strong. I can't control myself. I just burst out and then laugh and then cry in a ball. I dont understand. I was like crazy. I hate that feeling. I hate it! I hate it!!!",Jane crying so hard and started hurting herself.

We immediately reacted and move towards Jane and Austin, helping him stopping Jane.

"Jane.. Jane stop. Please stop. Jane..",I.said while shaking and trying to hold her hands to stop and same goes to everyone who gathered to calm Jane.

"Jane please. Its ok.. Calm down.. Please stop.",Austin beg.

"What did I do wrong?!! What?!! I can't take this anymore!!! Why?!!!",Jane screamed while trying to hurt herself.

"Please Jane.. Its ok. Please dont hurt yourself. Dont please.",I said now tears streaming down my face.

"What did I do? What? Please tell me what did I do wrong?",Jane continued to cry.

"You did nothing Jane. You did nothing. Shhh.. Its ok.. Its ok.. Calm down babe.. Calm down..",Austin said while rubbing Jane's back.

"Jane listen to me.. listen to us.. You have done nothing but goodness. Youre very kind, caring and lovable girl. Youre not worth hurting yourself. Youre amazing and beautiful. Maybe you're suffering for something you dont understand at the first place and you know what? Be glad for that because you know to yourself that youre absolutely done wonderful things when your sister was alive. You were a good sister. You listened to her, I can tell that because you know everything about your sister. You know everything she had been through since all of these things happened. Youre a good friend, a good sister and a good daughter. Always remember that Jane. We all love and cares for you.",I said while more tears rolling down my face.