Blue

2- at least i didn't have sex with my teacher

1 month earlier.

December 1st 2013

********************

I was stood by my locker, which was a purple one on the top row, switching my Trig books for my English ones when I heard three very familiar voices.

I turned to see Krista Rios, Whitney Turner and Courtney Thomas stood before me, a smirk present on each of their faces.

I clenched my jaw when I saw that Krista was wearing the cheer uniform with Cheer Captain printed on it; the same uniform I wore not even two months ago. The uniform was navy blue top and skort with red and white down the sides and eagles written over a big red A for The Ainston Eagles, which was our schools team. Krista's blonde hair was scraped into a high ponytail which was curled to perfection, whereas Whitney and Courtney's brown ponytails were pin straight.

All three of them were coated in orange foundation and had attached spiders to their eyes in an attempt to impress the boys.

Idiots.

I suddenly felt very conscious of what I was wearing and very bare without my cheer uniform. I was wearing a cream short sleeve and a blue skirt that came to just under my breasts with a brown belt around my waist at belly button height. I was also wearing my black platform lace up heels and nude tights with my hair hanging in loose brown curls at belt length.

"Well look what we have here, girls. The girl who used to wear my uniform." I narrowed my eyes at her.

"May I say, I wore it better." I smiled mockingly at her and her face hardened to stone.

"No, you may not." I rolled my eyes at her, feeling extremely hypocritical. I was just like Krista a couple months ago; completely oblivious to how much of a bitch I was being.

"Whatever." I dead panned and turned back to my locker.

"Whatever? You slept with my boyfriend and that's all you can say?" I clenched my fists and my nails dug into my palm enough to be close to drawing blood.

"What did you say?" I asked through gritted teeth, staring at the back of my locker.

"You heard me, slut." I spun to face her and took a step towards her so I was right up in her face. I was a fairly short person but my heels made us the same height.

"At least I didn't have sex with my teacher and get him fired. You're lucky they didn't lock him up."

"They should lock you up so no-one would have to stare at that fugly face of yours." I rolled my eyes and I turned and locked my locker door, not turning to face her after I had locked it.

"Shut the fuck up, Krista." I muttered.

"You're playing with fire, Alexandra."

"Then I'll have to make sure I don't get burnt." I took one last glance at her before turning and heading to English ten minutes early.

I slipped into the classroom and Aunt Melinda looked up from her desk. Aunt Melinda and my Mom were twins and both started working at Ainston High at the same time; and I had had Aunt Melinda for English for all four years of High School.

"Hey, Aunt Melinda." I smiled at her and swung my bag into my seat before heading over to her.

"How you holding up, kiddo?" She took her glasses off of her nose, revealing the little scar she had on the bridge of her nose, between her eyebrows. It was one of the only ways other people could tell her and my Mom apart. They both had shoulder length brown hair, which was naturally curly like mine, and dark inky blue eyes. Their faces were identical and they were both stick thin; all the girls in our family were, it was in the genes.

Well, except for Aunt Julia. She ate a lot.

"I wish everyone would stop asking me that." I sighed, sitting on the edge of her desk and playing with my fingers, examining my mint nail polish that was chipped on nearly every finger.

"We're just looking out for you, honey." I nodded and smiled at her. I knew that, but do you know how annoying it is for everyone in your whole family to ask how you are twice a day? Twice a day, every day?

"I know. It's just...it makes forgetting it even harder." 

"Sweetie... it's not something you just forget." I looked down at the wooden desk I was perched on.

"I know." I looked up at her and smiled. "Got anything for me?" I asked and her face immediately brightened. She handed me a book with a monochrome cover.

"Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher. Give it a go." I smiled and headed over to my seat when the first students started to trickle in. I kept my head buried in The Catcher In The Rye for the duration of class while Aunt Melinda talked with animation about the book to a bunch of half asleep teenagers. I'll give her points for not screaming at them to wake them up.

That's what I would have done.

The bell sounded and I hung back until everybody had left to talk to Aunt Melinda before hurrying to my next lesson. I sat in Physics with my eyes flicking nervously back and forth from the board and Adam Langurst, school Quarterback.

I clenched my fists at the thought of him. 

I ate lunch alone in the library which I didn't mind one bit. I was making up for lost time.

I had always loved to read as a child and I did read, religiously, until I became cheer captain. I don't know what happened or why it happened but I became a grade A bitch. Which is ironic because I was no longer a grade A student.

My grades dropped but I didn't care; I was head cheerleader for crying out loud, I was dating the Quarterback. I thought I had everything. I was so caught up in my new found popularity I forgot about my friends that I had had since I was 4. I forgot about my family. I forgot about my books. I forgot about myself.

And that's what hurt the most.

That I didn't realize what I had lost until I lost everything else as well.

Someone on Wattpad once wrote: 'and I realized then that sometimes you just had to feel the cold, before you could touch the sun.'

I was still waiting to touch the sun.

**********************

hey there. 

i just wanted to add quickly that this chapter is dedicated to @aggressively for the awesome quote at the end.

it's from her book 'trouble maker' which you should definatly read (then 'heart breaker') 

god, she's an amzing writer

love

a l e x