HELP - Colby Brock story

Suicide Bridge

Colby POV 

(Trigger warning... this is the first one where some people might find triggering)

i know my thoughts are getting to me again but i can't bring myself to speak them to someone. I want to leave this world, but i don't want to hurt sam more than i already have...

( the next day) 

i wake up to see sam sleeping with me again. I get up grab my black bag and put in there a photo of sam a length of rope, and my razor. i walk over to my nightstand and write a letter to Sam 

     Dear Sam,

Sorry Sam, but i had to leave you so i don't hurt you further more,                                                                  u have been there through everything my first crush,kiss, the first to everything                               

i love you so much but i dont want you to                                                                                                    cry over me, it will hurt you further and i don't want that.                                                                        i love you and thats all that matters, but i can't be helped.                                                                doing this might help me better than anything a specialist would have done                                         

everything that we have done was the best times i have ever had                                                       

but i still can't stop hearing voices, or doing all the shit i was doing                                                    right? you were helping me for everything, you deserve to have your life back                                      i'm the one that stole it from you, so i'm the one to give it back                                                                         don't do anything stupid, don't do what i did                                                                                                              go get your life back                                                                                                                                                 everything will go back to normal after.                                                                                                     Yours truly Cole Robert Brock  ♡

I walk over to Sam, giving him a kiss on his forehead, staying there for awhile taking in his scent and i walk out the door not looking back.

Sam POV 

I wake up to see Colby not beside me. I groan and get up feeling the cold air around me. seeing a letter on his bedside table i get up grabbing one of his Sweaters and walk towards the bathroom, brushing my teeth whilst brushing my hair. I walk back into the room to read the letter. My heart froze as i kept on reading it, i know what he was doing but my brain wasn't functioning right so i used up all of my voice to call elton. "Elton get up here now!" i yell through the door, hearing him run up the stairs as i slide down to the floor picking up Colbys Koala bear that was on the couch pulling in my legs and hiding my face in it. "SAM!" i feel more than two hands on me, so the other roommates must be in here. I show them the letter Colby wrote to me and shove it towards them until someone says "Sam i know where he is going" i look up to see Aaron looking at the letter "How?" he shows me the first letters of each line, i read it out seeing, suicide bridge. I look up in fear, pushing them out of my way. With a strand of hope i turn the ignition on and speed out of the driveway almost reaching my destination to be pulled over by the cops. I stop in anger hearing him speak but i speak first "i'm sorry sir but i need to get to my friend right now!" he looks at me "why" i grab the letter showing him the first letters of everyline "Because my friend is at suicide bridge and i don't want to loose him" he looks at me more "Ok i'll follow you till you get there, i dont care what speed limit but we need to help your friend now go!" he says while running to his car, i speed off towards my destination.

Colby POV 
i'm walking on the bridge for awhile trying to find the perfect place, to do it, and when i finally do i feel someone grab my shoulder and turn me around "Hey, you don't want to do that" i fully turn to see a stranger looking at me with sympathy "i know it may not feel like the best time in your life right now but you don't wanna do that" i sadly look at him seeing that he is Black and sweatshirt on saying you matter  "But it hurts to live like this, i want it over with, i want to leave" i say crying already "i know, but jumping off that bridge or cutting your arms is not the answer" he says while pointing at my wrists that show my cuts on there "I don't want to, but i don't want to hurt anyone else" i say looking at him "people would be more hurt if you left" i look torwards the bridge and back at him "what if they don't?" still looking at the bridge 

Oh don't worry Colby, they won't now don't listen to the nice man in front of you and do it already

Please stop this

Why i thought you liked me? 

No i don't your just annoying me, and ruining everything, i want you gone 

then do it already walk off and wait till he is gone then go down there and do it!

I look back at the man "Can i get your number?" he nods checks his phone and writes it down 
"I'll call you whenever, maybe you can help me to" i walk off far enough to not be seen by him and sit in the bushes for awhile. I walk back seeing him gone and walk down the bridge. I get to the bottom of the bridge going to the spot where we filmed the tfil video with elton. I open up my bag grabbing Sam's Photo and grabbing the Razor i had with it. I cut down both arms opening up all of my cuts, seeing everything come back to me like a movie, seeing everything from me and Sam smiling, to Me and Elton partying together, and it goes by so fast that ever single memory of the trap house goes through me to darkness...

Hey guys i found some suicide prevention hot-lines, if you now someone or it is you please call them..

Kids help phone ages 20 and younger- 1 800 668 6868

Alberta- 403 266 4347

US national suicide prevention life line- 1 800 273 Talk 

China hong kong- 2896-0000

england- 116123

france- 01-45-39-40-00

india- 91-44-2464-0050

ireland-  1 800 247 100 or text help to 51444

new zealand- 09 5222 999 

i was only able to find some...