As expected the club was packed. Katya had found a spot at the front with Adore and Violet, who were chatting with some girls who had traveled into town just to see Trixie. Pearl and Courtney were their names and Violet seemed to take special interest in Pearl.
"So Katya, have you ever heard Trixie live before?" Courtney suddenly asked.
"Yes, in her bedroom." Katya wanted to reply, however she quickly decided against it.
"No, never heard her in concert."
"Oh you're gonna love it, she's incredible!" Courtney said, practically jumping of joy. "Honestly I envy people here, so many of them must have known her before she was famous." She added.
"Actually, most of the people Trixie knew here moved away." Katya stated.
"Oh, really? So what about you, did you know her like Adore and Violet did?" The girl asked intrigued and clearly starstruck by the idea of talking to so many people who knew the country star personally.
"Better." Katya thought, but again she stopped herself.
"Yeah, yeah, we uhm went to school together." Katya stated, trying to not get into how much she actually knew the blonde Barbie-doll.
"Oh wow, that's so cool! What's she actually like?" Courtney asked with the glimmer of fan adoration sparkling in her eyes. Katya considered the question for a minute before answering honestly.
"She's the type of person who'll talk to anyone regardless of reputation, and who lights up the room as soon as she enters it. She's the type of person that no one can hate, no matter how hard they try." Courtney considered Katya's word for a second before replying;
"I guess I'm not the only one who's whipped for her, huh?" She laughed a bit at her own joke.
"You have no idea how whipped I truly am." Katya thought.
The show was incredible.
Trixie had been playing for 2 hours and still seemed to be overflowing with endless energy.
Adore was beyond pleased as the bar had gotten heaps of traffic all night and the audience overjoyed with the show they were being presented with.
Trixie was even better live. Somehow her voice sounded even more honest in it's delivery of the carefully penned lyrics when she sang them live. Katya had cried more than once so far.
"So, we're almost at the end of the night. I know, I know it's a shame, but I've decided to add two extra songs to tonights show as a special treat." Trixie stated with a smile.
The audience cheered as they realised they got a longer concert than most, and would get to hear songs that weren't on any other stops of the tour. Trixie's discography was long so she couldn't play all of her songs, and Katya was sure that more than one audience member had a favorite song that wasn't included in the original setlist.
"There's a song I haven't played in a while, actually I've only performed it live once before. Sometimes we write songs to people, about people, people that we care about, who somehow make an impact on our lives. But some of those songs never reach the ears of the intented listener. Well..there's someone here that this song was written for, and I'd like them to know it this time. So милая, this one's for you." Trixie stated, her russian pronounciation nearly perfect.
It had to be for her. It had to be.
Why else would Trixie just say a russian term of endearment instead of a name or nickname?
"Weirdness follows me wherever I go. Weirdness seems to know me even better than I seem to know myself, I'm someone else." Trixie started.
Soldier. The song was Soldier.
The song Katya had always felt so oddly attached to.
It was written about her, and Trixie was playing it because she was there!
Katya wasn't crazy, maybe some of Trixie's songs were really about her.
"Oh soldier, take your time.
No one said the words all have to rhyme, and if they do it's fine.
And even if they don't, no one needs to know. Woah woah soldier, you gotta let things go."
Katya had tears streaming down her face as Trixie sang the last chorus, unable to control herself. The audience clapped but Katya just stood there speechless and in tears.
"Oh wow, thank you, thank you very much! We've reached the final song of the evening and I thought what better way to end, then with an unreleased song?" Trixie states, gasps were heard in the audience. Courtney was practically jumping up and down in excitement.
"This is actually quite an old song. I started writing this right after I moved from here to Nashville, then finished it during my first US tour. You see, while I love my career, I left someone behind here, someone I care more about than anything in the world. She's someone who helped me and protected me when I needed protection. Someone who gave me the strenght to continue when my world felt like it was falling apart. I'm sure she knows who she is by now, and all I can do is pray she forgives and believes me. Like I said, I wrote this a long time ago, but the feelings didn't change. Here's Hello, Goodbye, Hello."
"To be honest, you're a dime
To be fair, you've got me on my knees"
Katya felt like she was in a dream, but Trixie was here. Trixie was singing songs about her.
Trixie was telling her everything she wanted to tell Katya back then.
"When I speak, I say your name
And when I wake, it's written up and down my walls
To be honest, it's the same
Grumble, mumble, tumble 'round without a cause"
Trixie looked out at the crowd, the room was too dark to see anyone clearly, but she prayed Katya was still there. She prayed Katya was listening.
"And if you get the time
The number is still mine
Baby, share a dime
On the line
There in Minnesota time
Hello, goodbye, hello
Hello, goodbye, hello"
Katya found herself asking
"Why didn't you call, Trixie? The number was still mine too for so long.", her bitter self briefly returning before she reminded herself that she could have tried harder to work things out.
"To be truthful, I don't know
If you're thinking what I think you do
To be fair, it's all for show
A clock's been ticking, tocking, taking time from you"
Trixie remembered those first months. The sorrow every time she couldn't get herself to call, the heartbreak everytime she realised that Katya wouldn't call her either.
The realization that she had lost her best friend, possibly forever.
"And if you get the time
The number is still mine
Baby, share a dime
On the line
Here in Minnesota time
Hello, goodbye, hello
Hello, goodbye, hello"
You can't force someone to forgive you.
You can't change the past.
You can't decide what a person feels.
No matter how much Trixie wanted Katya's forgiveness, she knew she couldn't try to force it.
She broke her best friend's trust, no matter her reasoning, that fact didn't change.
"I don't see spaces in between
I don't see colors running down the TV screen
There's no lines written in this scene
So I won't say a thing"
Katya took in the words, no matter how bitter she was, she couldn't help but notice how much longing the lyrics conveyed.
She always imagined that she was the only one who was miserable when Trixie left. She'd convinced herself that Trixie would move on and forget all about her, but Trixie hadn't.
Clearly some part of Trixie still truly cared. Cared enough not to play or publish this song until she could play it for Katya.
"And if you get the time
The number is still mine
Baby, share a dime
On the line
Here in Minnesota time
Hello, goodbye, hello
Hello, goodbye, hello"
"If you've got the time, maybe we can still be something. Maybe this time we could make it?" Katya thought as Trixie's fingers strummed the last chord and cheers filled the room.
YOU ARE READING
Sincerity Is Scary ✔~ trixya
Fanfiction"She's back in town you know. She's playing a show at Dolly's tonight." Violet said, trying to see if there was any hope of getting the bitter woman to swallow her pride. "I don't care. Why would I? She's no one to me." Katya replied, annoyed that...
