She's Rare

Chapter 4

Carissa's P.O.V

I wake up the next morning, my face buried between ross and the bed. I move away from him and see him still sleeping, but my sleeves rolled up. I quickly pull them down and wipe his tear stained cheeks with them. Ross' eyes flutter open and he looks at me, sadly.

I lay my head on his chest and listen to his heart beat. "Why're you up so early?" He asks after a few minutes.

I shrug. "I went to bed early." I sigh and hold the shirtless boy close to me.

He nods and I move up, so my face is in the croak of his neck. He brushes some hair out of my face and kisses my forehead. "You know I love you, right?" He asks suddenly. I nod and squeeze my eyes closed. "And I'd do anything to protect you and help you?" I nod again.

"Yeah, I know. But there's certain things I don't want help with." I whisper as I pull away to look at him.

"Fair enough.. but there's certain things you need to tell me about." He says and glances at my arms. "Like the reasons."

I shrug. "Can we talk later? I'm still tired." I lie.

He sighs and nods. I lay my head back down on his chest. "I love you, Carissa. Please don't ever think I don't." He whisper.

"I love you too." I say quietly before forcing myself back to sleep.

~~

I open my eyes to see I'm alone. I get up slowly and make my way to the bathroom. When I finish, I walk downstairs. I hear Ross on the phone. "Right, but she won't tell me." He says, angrily. "Yes, but I need her too." He pauses to let the other person talk. I walk into the kitchen and make myself some tea. "Okay, thanks. Bye." He says before hanging up and setting his phone on the counter.

I wave to him and go to sit on the couch. He plops down next to me and wraps his arm around my shoulders. "Kids?" I ask into the silence.

"Rydel and Ellington took them and Ellie to Chuck-E-Cheese." I nod and finish my tea in silence, until my stomach growls. "Want me to make you something or wanna go out to eat?" He asks politely.

"I wanna go to McDonald's for French fries!" I exclaim and jump up. He laughs and we walk to the car.

He orders me two large fries and a Big Mac and something for himself but I wasn't paying attention. I start eating the fries on the way home. He reaches for my hand and intertwines our fingers.

"Thank you, babe." I smile at him.

He nods. "You're welcome, darlin'. Anything for you." He says with a small smile.

When we get home, we quickly eat and sit on the couch to wait for the kids. "I have a question." I say as I turn to him.

He pauses the movie and faces me. "Okay.." He says nervously.

I take a deep breath. "Would you be mad at me if I had another miscarriage?" I ask as tears stream down my face.

His eyes widens and he shakes his head, pulling me into his arms. "No, baby. I wouldn't be mad at you." He whispers in my ear. "Is that why you.." he trails off.

I nod and sob harder. I sit up and wipe my tears. "I'm sorry.." I whisper and sniffle.

He kisses my cheek gently. "It's not your fault, baby. Come," he says and opens his arms to me.

I slowly scoot into his warm arms. "I'm okay. I think I'm okay." I whisper

He nods and kisses my head. "You wanna go out to eat tomorrow? Like a date?" He offers after a while.

I look up at his tear stained cheeks and nod. "Yes, I would love to." I say and bury my face in his neck.

He smiles, a small smile but a smile. "I'll ask my mom to watch the kids." He states as the kids run into the house.

"Mommy! Daddy!" They exclaim and climb on the couch.

Rydel, Ellington, and Ellie come in behind them. "How were they?" Ross asks as they sit on the couch opposite of us.

"Amazing! They were so polite!" Rydel exclaims happily. Carissa looks down at her feet, not paying attention to anything. "How are you guys?" Rydel asks, breaking the silence.

Ross' P.O.V

Carissa looks up and shrugs. "Good," she says softly.

"Are you okay?" Ellington asks concernedly.

I lean over to Carissa and whisper, "can I tell them?" She nods. I turn back to them. "She had another miscarriage.." I whisper.

Rydel's jaw drops. "Oh my god. I'm so so sorry! Are you okay? Do you want us to take the kids over night?" She asks worryingly.

Carissa shakes her head. "No, it's okay." She whispers.

"Babe," I whisper.

She looks up at me. "What?" She snaps.

"They're offering." I say quietly.

She shrugs. "I don't know.. I feel bad because you've had them all day." She sighs and looks at my sister.

Rydel motions for the kids to go upstairs. "I'll take them. It's no big deal, rissa." Rydel says and stands up.

She hugs Carissa and I go upstairs to pack their bag. "Daddy, is mommy okay?" Shor asks as I pack some toys.

I nod. "Yes, mommy is okay. She's just tired." I sigh.

"Tired of us?" Sadie asks innocently.

I shake my head. "No, baby. She just needs sleep." I say and we go downstairs.