The Sadness Feels Heavier Underwater

WELCOME TO THE BLACK PARADE - denver

Just got home. I go to the kitchen, A, to get myself something to eat, and B, as not to deal with Lee. His new boyfriend's over and I want as little interaction as possible. I need time to think. 

I'm just about to walk out of the kitchen, packet of cheesy doritos in hand, when Lee corners me by standing right in the doorway. I hate it when he does this. He doesn't understand that me being emo means I really, REALLY don't want to socialise with multiple people at one time. 

We are so dissimilar that we could practically just be adopted. He stands there in the doorway, looking at me eagerly with his big brown eyes. His lashes are amazingly thick and dark, and he has the neatest dimples you could ever imagine. His teeth are neat too. His hair is a lot more fashionable than mine, greasy, black and straight. His is technically light brown, but he bleached it the other day, and it's been curly as hell for as long as I can remember. 

"I don't think you've met Hayden yet," he perks, indicating the guy next to him.

"No, I haven't," I sigh, trying my best to look politely tired.

All I really want to do is just get up to my room, lie down, and think. But as my eyes move upwards to meet the two kids hands grasped together, I know I couldn't do it. I'm a sucker for my brother, I really am. He's wearing this kind of pastel striped t-shit, mainly purple, and his favourite pair of acid washed jeans. I can tell that he has made a big effort to look good, more than he usually does. I think he might really like this guy. Like, a lot. He's even done his hair properly.

I glance up at the stairs, and silently tell them that I'll be seeing them later, as soon as humanly possible in fact.

"Come!" Lee beams, motioning for me to follow him and his boyfriend to the ancient blue corduroy sofa that they were both sitting on before I got home. I plonk myself down with raised eyebrows as I wait for the others to take a seat.