Strings And Shadows (Lubbock x reader) Completed

understand

Edited
The worst part is they aren't nightmares they are memories
By:?
I've been resting for a few days now. Turns out the shape shifter girl is dead including the man with the gas mask on esdeaths team.

It was night and I heard yelling. Akame and tatsumi? I walked down to see people already there. I stayed away but close enough to hear. "I'm not strong. I stay like this for the team!" She screamed. I couldn't hear the rest. Other then them excepting why she I so cold.

What about me? I am doing the same thing and they hate me for it. I guess I'm much colder about it but it's the only way I won't fall apart.

I snuck outside to a quiet place in the woods. It was cold and dark. I felt hot tears rin down my face. Tears for the people who died. For what I've done. I cryed and cryed till I fell asleep.

I felt something shake me. I looked up to see lubbock. "What?" I asked the sun blinding me. "Why are you out here?" He said. "I fell asleep. Who cares?" I asked.

"I do. I care. We're you crying?" He asked getting worried. "Since when! And I am not crying." I said. He looked at me with pity. "Don't look at me like that." I said. "I'm sorry for what I said. I'm sorry for ignoring you." He said.

"It doesn't matter." I said. He grabbed me and pulled me close to him. "No your not. I see your not. You keep to yourself. I don't want to see you hurt." He said. I knew he was right. I didn't look at him. His grip tightened "please look at me!" He said tears stained his face.

I was breaking and I don't like it. My chest hurt and I couldn't stop the tears from falling. I pushed him away and layed on the tree. My knees to my chest and my head bared between them. It hurt so much. Why?

I felt warm arms around me. I flinched and they hesitated. "It's ok f/n." Lubbock raped his arms around me. "It's ok I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not knowing sooner. I'm sorry for what I called you." He said.

"It's not your fault. I made sure to be alone. Unfortunately that is how it will be." I said getting up wiping my tears away. "Why? Why do you want to be alone so bad?" He asked. "Because it what I deserve!"I said

"I deserve it ok. I've done horrible things." I said. I felt his arms around me. "No you don't no one does. I'm here fore you remember that." He said

My head started to spin. "I don't feel good lubbock." I said. He grabbed me. I was passing out. "F/n?!" He said before everything went black.

Time skip
I woke up to see tatsumi beside me crying. "W-what happened?" I asked. "It's l-lubbock" he said. "What wrong with lubbock?!" I said shaking. "I'm sorry he is d-dead." Tatsumi said.

I couldn't believe it. No no not him! "LUBBOCK!" I shouted for him. I ran into the hall to see everyone gathered but no lubbock. "Where is Lubbock?!" I said. Everyone looked down. "He is dead" the boss said.

I felt everything shatter. Everything I keeped up. My mask my heart. It all shattered. Lubbock keeped me together and now he is gone. "No! No your lying! You have to be!" Tears spilled from my eyes.

"I'm sorry f/n." The boss said not knowing what to do. No one has ever seen you like this. "Why do they always die." I whispered. "F/n-" Leone tried to say. "Shut up." I said in pure hate. Black smoke came out from me. My demons coming back to haunt me.

They would whisper so much. Everyone could hear. Hear what I could hear every night. Loud and painful. I finally got my emotions under control but it wasn't easy. It hurt so much especially without lubbock. I went back to my usual self.

"I'm s-sorry I didnt mean to let it out." I said. The were scared "what was that?" Asked the boss. "The worst thing about this curse. If I don't keep it under control they will come out. They will tear you down mentally. I usually can't sleep that much unless I'm in deep sleep. Otherwise they will show up in dreams." I said

"I'm sorry I never knew." The boss said. "It doesn't matter. It was my mistake but right now I want the capital gone more then ever." I said. "Unfortunately you can't go. Your still recovering." She said. "why? I'm perfectly fine!" I said

"I don't think it's a good idea. But it's your choice." She said. I nodded. Right then tatsumi came up. "F/n I have to give this to you. Lubbock wanted it for you." He said. I nodded and opened it.

Dear f/n
I'm sorry for being so oblivious to you. You have suffered so much for us. I remember hearing your screams in the night. Im sorry I didn't come to you sooner. Unfortunately my time is up. I dont want you to come to early but I do wish to see you again. I need to tell you something that I never admitted to anyone not even myself. I love you so much I never stopped. Please don't be alone find someone to love and live for me.

Your secret crusher lubbock

Tears ran down my face. I love you to lubbock.  With that we left for the mission. It went as a blur mostly. I was out of it half the time. In the end mine died. But we succeeded and finally able to make our first move.

It was finally time. I was to be a distraction. I walked through town people screaming. Scared of me that I was alive. The resistance watched as people was scared just by me walking.

Soon it started. The imperial arms of the young prince came out. Kids were screaming. People were scared. I saw I family about to be crushed.