Sad Imagines

"4:00 AM" (part three)

***Zayn's POV***

Only getting 3 and a half hours of sleep, I find a blank piece of paper and pen. After quite a while of writing, since it was incredibly hard for me to write, I fold the paper and set it down on the middle of the dining room table, somewhere I know she'll see it.

I change back into my normal clothes, and take one last look around the house. The house I've gotten a bit attached to. The house where the girl I love will live.

I walk to the front door and go outside, locking it behind me. I slide the key under the door, since it will be no longer needed for me.

I start walking along the sidewalk, turning into a small jog, to make sure (Y/N) hopefully doesn't see me.

I run, and run, and keep running. Until I saw the place I wanted to go. The bridge.

This bridge had a lovely view of the forest, with the sun rising up right above tree line. I take a deep breath of fresh air. I'll need this.

***Your POV***

You heard some movement around downstairs, just assuming it's Zayn going to the bathroom or getting some food. You get dressed, throwing on jeans and a nice top.

Next, you went to the bathroom. You fixed your hair, brushed your teeth, and put on some light makeup.

What am I gonna say to Zayn?

All you know is that you're tired of his ways, his partying, his carelessness. You can't be with him. Maybe he'll find somebody else who loves to go out just as much as he does. You're not that person.

You go downstairs, but don't see Zayn.

"Zayn?" You call out.

Oh! You remember hearing the door open, he probably went out for a smoke.

But he's not outside. And his key is in front of the door.

You look in the bathroom, living room, and kitchen, but he's not here. What the heck?

Wait.

There's a note on the table! Maybe he went out to get something. You went over and picked up the piece of paper, unfolding it.

Well, this was a really long note.

In his messy writing, it read:

Dear, (Y/N).

When you find this, I'll probably be gone already. Don't look for me, I'm not coming back to the house.

I just wanted to let you know that I love you. I really do love you,
(Y/N). I won't ever love anybody again like I loved you. And I wanna thank you for trying to help me all this time, but sadly, I'm too broken to fix. I have missing pieces, I'll never be completely put together. You did help me heal a little though, and I appreciate that more than you can imagine.

Truth is, (Y/N), I've been upset with myself since I was a child. I really hate myself. I'm a failure, an asshole, and I'm sorry for ever dragging you down my road. Maybe you would be happier if you hadn't have met me. You're such an amazing person, and I'm a worthless, broken man.

The reason I partied and got wasted all the time was to forget about my childhood, forget about my self struggles for a while. Forget about the fact that I can't do anything right. That last party I went to, I couldn't even focus. Plus, my mom's gone, (Y/N). I miss her so much. She was everything to me and my asshole of a father ruined that. What I would give to be with my mom one more time.

Promise me you'll find someone who makes you happy. Find someone who can love you unconditionally, who will spend time with you instead of getting wrecked all the time like me. Find someone who makes you strong, like you made me. You deserve so much better than me, (Y/N), all I did was put you through shit you didn't need to go through.

***Zayn's POV***

I push myself up to stand on the railing of the bridge. The view is even prettier from here.

I'll miss these kinds of views.

***Your POV***

Remember, I'll love you always, (Y/N).
You don't need me.
But I promise we'll meet one day again, in a while.

It'll be better for everybody once I'm gone, and better for me. I won't hate myself anymore, and I can be with my mom again, (Y/N).

I love you so much. Goodbye.

Love,
Zayn.

And it hit you. Your chest sunk. Your heart stopped beating for a second. Your legs buckled, and you knelt. You felt tears violently spill from your eyes, and they streamed down your cheeks.

***Zayn's POV***

"I'll always love you, (Y/N)." I say out loud, and a single tear rolls down my left cheek.

I take one last breath, and I jump.

This exhilarating feeling is also something I'll miss.

***Your POV***

"Zayn!" You sobbed out, almost to the point of hyperventilating.

Tears filled your eyes, falling into your mouth and onto the floor.

"I'll always love you, Zayn." You hiccup through your sobs. He may have put you through a lot, but you did fall in love with him.

***Zayn's POV***

I'm finally happy with myself.