Hopelessly Devoted To Music

Problems From The Past

Lucy had been completely honest with me from the start of us being together as a couple like I had also been with her, her Mum and even the rest of her family. I knew Lucy had baggage like they all knew I had baggage of my own.

However as the new year rolled around, Lucy started to hit a bad road once more and it was the first time I had ever experienced it from her. She struggled with change like when a new year came along before I had met her and before leaving school, in Year 10 and 11, she had gone down the line of booze drinking and the occasional line of drugs to rid her sorrows.

The thing is we'd drunk a bit of alcohol when out before at meals and we'd never gone silly over it. Quite the opposite in fairness but when it came to Lucy buying a few drugs, I had to see it to believe it for myself.

She'd go out to nip to the shops to get something like a drink or food but then on route, would then meet with "a friend" who'd sort her out with what she needs. I was oblivious to it all until the end of January when she was getting a tad silly around me in terms of her behaviour which came across like she was a different person. Even on one occasion, she'd pop to the shops and come back like a different person before snogging me one in her bed. It got to a point when we'd get back in from college and she'd hit the booze like nothing else instantly.

It got to a point where I caught on she was stinking of booze and I despised it entirely. I eventually followed her one night to see her doing what she needed and I was left hurt but I felt like this was my mess and I need to help her from it.

This night, she was swaying from side to side like a drunk when she went to meet her "friend" and I caught her in the act. She was a mess that night and from what I had seen in photos of her back a few years ago, it was like she was going back to that. I rung Lucy's mum in the end to pick us up so we could head back to her house and it was there where Lucy broke down and cried in my arms once we got home because of how sorry she was over going back to her old ways.

I couldn't do anything but realise this will make us stronger no doubt now. We'd been a couple for a number of months and never dealt with anything like this before so our first hiccup was always gonna be a struggle. 

That night, Lucy changed from her "chavy" black puffy looking clothes and into relaxing and comfortable clothes. I even agreed to stay the night so she knew I was fine with her and I still loved her of which I still did. I felt hurt but my love for Luc was still strong as ever. That night was the first night I technically slept with her, my loving and cherished girlfriend and the following morning, she couldn't stop hugging me both whilst in her bed and whilst at college. She was fearful she was gonna lose me because of what she had done but more, I was fearful I was gonna lose her if being truthfully honest.

It made me realise that we all have our problems. Lucy's were just her own and it was a dual partnership we had to make things better. If she put the time into ensuring her past problems were sorted, then we would be a better couple like I would be able to achieve.