Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea

Chapter 3: Haunted

"This is your spot, and breaking stuff is your thing, plus I...I.. already break everything I touch for once I wanted to see something whole." 

I put my head in my hands and sighed. I slid down the wall. My shirt caught on the rugged bricks and slid up. I didn't bother moving it back down even though the frigid air made me shiver. I heard Harley chuckle from somewhere above me. 

"Before you say anything, yes I understand how cheesy that sounds," I said quietly.

"I brought you here to 'my spot' as you say, to be real with you. I could care less about you breaking a stupid bottle. Ella, I just want us to feel comfortable sharing things. And thankfully we seem to be opening up. 

 I come here alone to take my aggression from my home life out on the bottles. And then as I'm cleaning them up Mark comes out and talks to me. It helps to let things go out into the night. It's a type of therapy for me. And at the end of every conversation I have with Mark he always asks," Here he paused.I took this opportunity to really look at him again. 

I only ever saw Harley in the hallways at school. And even then I didn't pay attention to him much. He just recently started messaging me. 

Tonight he looked devilishly handsome, his platinum blond hair looked white in the moonlight. And his black lip ring was a stark contrast to his pale complexion. As he crouched down beside me I felt my heart flutter like a wounded butterfly trying to fly. I knew Harley was handsome, but I usually kept my distance.

"What do you want from me?" he whispered from somewhere beside me. It resembled the sound of the cold breeze blowing in my ear.

His words laid heavy on my mind, what do I want from him? I guess deep down I expected him to be different. Honestly, I expected to be different this time. It seemed the person changed, but the situation didn't, isn't that how it always went? Every time I tried to give my heart away to someone new, we always ended up here.

I told Molly I didn't believe in falling in love. The truth was it just hadn't happened to me yet.

"Love" I whispered as a tear rolled down my cheek. I kept my head buried in my knees so he wouldn't see me break.

It reminded me of all the times I was left crippled by Cassius's words. He was good at drawing me in and making me feel special. But I learned too late he didn't love me. I think he was honestly incapable of love.

I heard his words start to echo in my mind. I started shaking and not from the cold. I was so angry and scared and nervous. I didn't know what was going on inside me but there was a hurricane forming.

Tears welled up in my eyes as anger swelled up in my heart. I couldn't get any words out. I knew I shocked him with what I had said. It was audible in his sharp intake of breath. But I couldn't stop, the storm was too strong.

I wanted to surrender myself to it. I sat there with my hands balled into fist. They were trembling as I tried to hold back the storm from forming.

In that moment my vision was lost. Everything was hazy as tears clouded my vision. Heat rose into my cheeks causing them to become bright red. My heart pounded so loud and fast that I thought it would give out. I couldn't hear anything any more. All I could hear was the rush of blood in my ears, it was boiling. His voice penetrated my mind...

"You know I can't fulfill your unrealistic expectations Ella. You've been brought up to live for yourself, you never take into account what someone else wants.

That's why you don't have a heart left, when you continually give it out hoping the next guy will heal what the other broke. I remember him lifting my quivering chin as he said this.