Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea

Chapter 4: Time

I was so tired when I got home, but I couldn't go to sleep no matter how hard I tried. I kept thinking back to what Harley had said. I didn't want to think about what he was referring to. Even if I had wanted to my memories from that night are still hazy. It was just two weeks ago that it had happened. But like the police officer had told me, I would have trouble remembering that incident for some time because of my concussion.

All I remember from that night is hearing the ringing in my ears when I came back to. And then the awful headache that ensued. It only worsened when I heard all the yelling and sirens.

I was lying on the ground, but I didn't remember how I got there. My body felt numb for a time, now my nerves were coming back to their senses. I was tingling all over. I looked around to try and figure out what had happened. I saw the police cars pulling up as all the teens fled from the house party.

A female officer approached me. I saw a look of disgust and sadness fill her eyes. I looked down at myself and saw all the blood seeping into my baby pink dress. There was a trail of blood by my feet as well. I followed it with my eyes and that was when I realized the severity of the situation.

My mother's warm embrace and soft singing comforted me as I let out my cries of pain as I remembered parts of that night.

I finally found the sweet surrender of sleep around midnight thanks to my mom singing to me. She was the most compassionate person I knew. She always came to comfort me no matter how late it was. It really was remarkable considering How early she had to get up to go to work at the bakery she owned.

"Ella I'm heading out but I left you some bear claws on the counter. Don't forget to leave dad one okay? I love you sweetie call me if you need me today" she brushed my blond hair aside and kissed me on the forehead before she left. 

Ah yes the bittersweet reality of getting a delicious breakfast at 4 o'clock.

I mumbled a groggy I love you back before getting pulled back into the ocean of unconsciousness.

If only I wouldn't have set my alarm for 6 a.m. arrgghhh

I threw back my warm covers to get ready for school. It felt like a bouncy ball of nerves was bouncing in my stomach. I thought I was going to be sick. It was easy going the whole summer without seeing him. But there was no escaping him for good, especially at school.

I recall what my therapist told me, "Focus your thoughts on your breath. Calm your mind" I took a deep breath and started getting ready.

Ever since that night I haven't been able to wear anything pink. Not after I saw my once beautiful dress covered in blood. I opted for a high waisted skirt and my favorite t-shirt tied in the front.

I tried my best to cover up the yellow bruise under my eye and around my nose with makeup. Then I created a dramatic cat eye, hopefully it would serve as a distraction.

I took another deep breath before I left the comfort of my room. I plastered a smile on my face as I ran down stairs. Thankfully no one was home and I could be as loud as I wanted to be.

I skipped into the quiet kitchen and flipped on the light as I started singing, "she looks so perfect standing the-" 

"Surprise!!!"

"AHHHHH" I screamed as I clutched my chest.

"Oh sweetie we're sorry we didn't mean to scare you. We just wanted to surprise you on your first last day of school" mom said as she came around the kitchen island to hug me.

"Oh, *wheeze laugh* Ella I wish you could've seen you face" dad said before he tried to imitate my shocked expression.

"Stop it Jeffrey" mom said after she smacked him playfully on the arm.

I rolled my eyes, "Well you better be glad I didn't have my pepper spray on me" I said as I reached into the bag of deliciousness and brought out a delectable bear claw. MMMMmm the smell is even intoxicating 

I chomped off nearly half the top in one bite before dad ruffled my hair, "Oh I am," He gave me and mom a tight hug. I took a deep breath and was enveloped in his minty scent of aftershave. "I need to be going. Have a good day you two. And hey Ell keep your paws off my bear claw" he winked before heading to the front door. 

I finally finished chewing, "Thank you, I should probably head out too" I grabbed my floral lunch box off the blacktop counter and waved goodbye to my mom. When I reached the front door I saw a blurry silhouette of my dad through the frosted window. I hurriedly threw my backpack around my shoulders and headed outside.

As I closed the door behind me my dad turned towards me with a distraught look on his face. He spoke before I had time to ask him what was wrong.

"Ella, I don't like the fact that you are going back to the same school as him." He clenched his fist at his side. "In fact, I don't like that you are even going back to school at all." he began brushing his fingers through his hair.

"I think after a person goes through a traumatic experience like you did...well they need to give their mind a rest." I stood completely still as he continued on. I was nervous to go back of course, but knowing how my father felt about it only made me more petrified. "You know if you aren't comfortable with this, we still have time to homeschool you."

I loosened my tongue from its resting place on the roof of my mouth. "I..." My father's face fell as I tried to croak out a response. He wrapped his strong arms around me. I felt a tear fall onto my cheek as I hugged him tightly back.

I quickly collected myself as I pulled back and looked into my father's green eyes, they were glossed over, much like mine. "Dad, I'm okay I promise. This is the only way I see myself getting better. And like you always tell me, I need to face my fears" I choked out a laugh. I saw a small smile start to form on his face.

He stepped back and said, "I'm so proud of you. I really do need to leave now. But I am expecting you to call me if you change your mind okay?" he patted my shoulder. I just nodded in response. I was too afraid if I tried to speak again I would cry.

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To be continued...

I apologize for not updating for awhile. I haven't been feeling up for writing here recently. I wrote this just to get my creative juices flowing again. Let me know what you think!! 

As always I am sending much love to you all <3