Love mechanics FF 2 (Love Again)

Party

Vee's POV

I don't understand how seeing someone having a good life without you hurt so much that it makes you want to die but that is exactly the case everytime I see the boy smiling and having fun with his friend that time seems to be teasing me as it moves slowly, Mocking me as if to tell me to feel the regret for my actions. It's supposed to be only a week long trip but for me it feels like eternity, Including the first day here when I talked to the junior it has been 3 days and the remaining 4 seems to have stuck.

"What is up with you?" ask north bring me back to reality as I break my eyes away that were staring at the figure of the junior playing with his friend and some of the 1st years at the beach.

"Nothing, just looking at the sea" I replied lazily

"Yeah sure, we believe you" yiwaa scoffed, mocking me as if to say that she know what I am looking at. "I guess Mark is still avoiding you" she added

"Well I don't blame him" Bar spoke this. He is actually the only one who knows the detail of what is going on all the others are just assuming and making up stories that are actually too basic compared to the bitter reality.

"Are you all done?" I asked annoyed at how they were reacting

"No" said Yiwaa laughing and all the other followed her making me roll my eyes "If you are that upset why not just talk to him" Wow what a great plan like who would have thought of that.

"Already did" I replied sternly

"Wait, you did?" ask Bar in a shock and I nodded "when?" he added

"First night of the trip"

"And?" he asked again with curious eye. Like what is he even expecting

"He doesn't want to talk"

"Maybe you should stop bothering him. Even I wouldn't want to talk if I were in his position" he said making me sigh and honestly he is not even wrong. I don't think anyone would want to have anything to do with a person like me But regardless of my mind's rational thinking my heart would not let me leave Mark be and my eyes would always drift back to him.

Just like now when my eyes are fixed on the boy again as I ignore my friends who are still talking about God knows what? I stop staring only when the other also look towards me and our eyes meet, making the situation awkward. I never thought that just looking at someone could make you feel this guilty let alone thought that I'd ever find myself in such a situation but here I am unable to look the junior in the eyes and say that I feel nothing.

I was sorry but had no idea how to ask for forgiveness, do I even deserve to be forgiven after what I had done. I have actually seen the boy from afar for a long time and know exactly how much he suffered but I couldn't do anything and knowing that I was the cause of his suffering didn't help much.

I sighed again joining in on my friend's conversation as we sat near the evening beach, we were planing to have a BBQ party so nearly every student was at the beach even though it was getting dark, most of us were just chatting and playing but some responsible ones were already preparing stuff from the party.

I couldn't help but notice Mark who parted from his friend and went over to help the seniors with preparations, guess he a responsible one too. Once everything was ready everyone else joined in too when all we had to do was cook the meat.

It was an enjoyable evening, for once my mind was not thinking of the boy who is eating and getting drunk with his friends 'Why does he drink so much though?' I shrug my thoughts away reminding myself to not care about him but one can only control his conscious thoughts to a limit and my limit is until I see the focus of my attention being so drunk that he has separated from his friend group and is now chatting with every student he sees.

'What is wrong with this kid?' I thought angrily even if I know full well I have no right to get involved with whatever he does. 'Damn it' I curse my own stupid self as my feet walk on there own and I am once again standing in front of the junior.

Guess they will have to meet somehow and that was the best was I guess 😅 tell me what you think about it.
Also if you like this story you guy may want to check out "Hate and Regret" which is basically about same topic but takes place after the 1st chapter of love mechanics novel. So check it out if you like.