EUNJUNG
I couldn't believe my ears.
I'm sitting across my father, and the woman I was in the elevator with just a while ago. Their hands intertwined on top of the table and an eye catching diamond ring on her finger.
"I hope you're not that shocked, dear." The woman said, her sophisticated tone entering my ears.
Shock was an understatement. I didn't know what word to use to describe what I'm feeling. Disappointment, maybe? Hurt? Confusion? Hate? Everything happened too quickly, almost like a quick spark of lightning, now my feelings are all mixed up.
My dad is re-marrying. Ever since my mother died, I knew there would come a time that father would want to fill his heart again. I know he'd want someone to fill the whole that my late mother had left. I just didn't think it would be anytime sooner. It's only been two years. I haven't even recovered from her death, but my father looks completely okay?
I thought he called me to check on me. I thought he wanted to know how I was, if I was okay being alone and independent. I thought he wanted to see me, even if I'm not really his daughter. I thought that maybe finally, after two long years, I'd get to see and feel his love for me. Maybe I was wrong all along.
"Excuse me." I murmured as I gently placed the table napkin on top of the glass table.
I rushed out of the conference room and made my way to my father's office. I wanted to cry because my chest felt so tight. My heart was palpitating like crazy, like it was begging me to lighten the sensation. I felt very betrayed and hurt by the fact that dad didn't even tell me that he planned to court another woman after we lost mother.
I always knew that my grandpa didn't really care for mother, or at least for me, but I just didn't think that father was the same. I thought he was on my side. I thought he got my back. We spent enough years together. Now he plans to build another family. That only means one thing. That means that from now on, I'm by myself.
"What's wrong with you?" I heard his baritone from behind.
I quickly wiped away my tears as I turned to face my father. I gave him an apologetic smile and looked down.
"I'm sorry, Dad. I was just caught off guard." I gently said, trying my best to hide the shakiness on my small voice.
He sighed, "It's not good to walk out from serious discussions. Did we teach you that kind of behavior? Or did you also picked that up from the streets?"
I bit my lip as I gently closed my eyes. Beyond anything, I consider words as the most powerful weapon to weaken someone. Father sure knows how to use his words against me, and I'm trying my best to convince myself that it's okay. He's my father. Regardless of how he hurts me, I should still act grateful because I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for him and his money.
"I'm just shocked that you're re-marrying earlier than I expected." I mumbled slowly, making sure I picked out the right things to say.
He let out a humorless chuckle, "You don't have a say on my personal life, Choi Eunjung."
Tears started to stream down my face when he said my name. My current name. He never really called me anything sweet like "dear" or "honey" unlike what I commonly hear in dramas and from other parents to their children, but I just thought he'd atleast consider me as his daughter. As a Lee. Even if I'm not really one, even if I was never really one.
