New Beginning

Chapter Thirty-Two

***A/N: Hello all, this chapter is a bit different but I've been meaning to write it out for a while. I've wanted to dive into Elara's past and I know some of you have wanted to see what she has been through before as well. So I hope you like it. That being said, I feel I should put in a trigger warning. This chapter deals with loss and childbirth so reader beware! Let me know what ya think! ***

Everything was fuzzy, the air warm and thick with the smell of sweet cinnamon apples. It was familiar and my body was heavy with the comfort of it. My fingers crept over the warm threadbare quilt, searching for the heat and protection offered by the person who usually took up the other half of the bed. My eyes fluttered open when all I found was cool cotton, and I drew in the apple pie filled air disappointedly. I sat up on one elbow and looked around the cold empty room disappointedly. I wasn't used to waking alone, but then my mind supplied the reminder that I had only lied down for a nap. Stretching, my arms reached out above me, I rolled over — lowering my feet to the cold floor. My bare feet collided with the empty chamber pot and I grimaced, glad that Maria had emptied it the night before. I gently edged it under the bed with my toes and stood, walking over to the washstand in the corner. I felt sweaty and disgusting, having wrapped the quilt around myself even in the humid room. With a palm-covered yawn, I gathered the tattered piece of fabric from the hook and placed it over my arm. I picked up the white porcelain pitcher and poured water into the chipped basin in the center. After a quick wash, I slipped on my underdress and took a deep stifled breath — placing a hand on my distended stomach. "Maria!" I called.

The heavy oak door opened and my maid hurried in, her long black hair was tied up in an elegant bun under her hood. Her dark grey uniform was clean and well kept, something my husband was adamant about.

"My lady, you are not meant to be out of bed in your condition. The physician said so. The babe could come at any moment," she exclaimed, flocking around me worriedly.

Maria had been my constant companion; father had tasked her with my care at the moment of my birth. I was grateful for her ever protective and faithful friendship. Without her, I would have been lost amid my darker moments. The magic I had been gifted could be as much a curse as the one that promised my demise. There was good in it, like being able to discover that I was having a son before his birth, but there was also such sadness, like seeing those stuck in-between life and death. I was lucky to find Maria, she had been taught the old ways by her grandmother, so she had no reason to fear what I could see or do — and she was the only one I had trusted with my story.

Placing my palm on my lower stomach, I smiled softly at the pressure pressing against my hand as my son fluttered inside me. "Maria I am well. You and I both know that it's not yet my time. Today is not the day." I sadly pointed at my wardrobe. "Will you help me dress?" I asked. We both knew what tomorrow would bring, but I was doing my best to avoid it. I was terrified for the tiny being inside of me but didn't want to pull anyone else into my sadness. I thought it best to live in the moment.

Maria pulled her caustic brown eyes from my midsection, huffing irritably as she stomped toward my wardrobe, yanking open the double doors. "On your own head be it. It may not be your time, but what of the young sir's, hmm?" she scathingly remarked, brow cocked.

I bit my lip in discomfort, guilt pinking my cheeks. No matter what, Maria never let me give up. She wouldn't allow me to just sit back and wait to die with no regard for how my death would affect others. It was just what I did, it was my default setting after so many centuries and I very easily fell back into it. Thankfully, she was always here to remind me. I placed both hands on my stomach, regretfully closing my eyes.