Andrew

26

~ Me and Shawn sang some songs. After a while we decided to take a break. I sat down in the eat area with Shawn. My dad had to do some other stuff. "So...." Shawn said. ~

"So how are you?" Shawn said. "I am fine what about you?" I answered. "I am good" Shawn said with a smile. Damn that smile. "Nice" I said. Than an awkward silence came. The silence I really hate. "Lets go back to the studio" Shawn said after a while. I nodded and walked after him. We walked to the studio and I saw that my dad had my notebook in his hands. What!! I grabbed the notebook out his hands and looked really mad at me. "THAT IS MINE, DON'T TOUCH IT!" I yelled. My dad looked confused.... shocked at me. "It laid open there and i saw a beautiful text!" My dad said. "I Dont Care!" I said mad. "Please sing it...." My dad asked. I sighed i could never say no to him. I walked to the microphone and started to sing the song..... the song i wished i would never sing. Yes its also about Shawn.... i wrote it a while ago.
-
"Everything's been so messed up here lately
Pretty sure he don't wanna be my baby
Oh, he don't love me, he don't love me
He don't love me, he don't love me
But that's okay
'Cause I love me, yeah, I love me
Yeah, I love me
Yeah, I love myself anyway
Hey
Everything's gonna be alright
Everything's gonna be okay
It's gonna be a good, good, life
That's what my therapist say
Everything's gonna be alright
Everything's gonna be just fine
It's gonna be a good, good life
I'm a mess, I'm a loser
I'm a hater, I'm a user
I'm a mess for your love, it ain't new
I'm obsessed, I'm embarrassed
I don't trust no one around us
I'm a mess for your love, it ain't new" I sang.

( I'm a mess from Bebe Rexha but in this story Y/n wrote it)
-
My dad looked surprised... proud and shocked. Probably shocked of my words.
"I'm a mess, I'm a loser
I'm a hater, I'm a user
I'm a mess for your love, it ain't new
I'm obsessed, I'm embarrassed
I don't trust no one around us
I'm a mess for your love, it ain't new" I sang and than I was done.
My dad looked at me.... "that's beautiful... deep" My dad said. Shawn looked deep in my eyes. "Thanks dad" I said looking away from Shawn's eyes. "When did you write it?" My dad asked. "Some days ago" I said. "About who?" Shawn asked. I looked at him. "Nobody in special" I said. "Can we go dad?" I asked. My dad nodded softly. "Yeah sure we are done here" my dad said. He gave Shawn a bro hug. I already walked to the car, not even saying bye to Shawn. "Forget him" I whispered against myself. "Who?" My dad asked. I looked at him, I didn't notice he was already here. "Uh nobody, its just an idea for a song" I said making my dad nod. Well I didn't lie.... I will really write a song named like that. We drove home and I walked to my room. "What did you do?" I whispered against myself. I grabbed my notebook and started writing.
-
"Why am I thinking about you?
You are not worth all my pain.
But why am I feeling bad?
Your not caring, never did about me.
So why am I feeling like this?
What did I do?

Just forget him.
Yeah forget him.
Because he never.
Thinks about me.
I tell myself everyday.
But it doesn't help.... at all" I wrote and song softly.

(Forget him , wrote it by myself)

I laid on my bed, looking at the ceiling. What are those feeling inside? Why can't I fucking explain them. I don't fucking understand myself. What the hell did i do? Why does I feel different to Shawn now... I didn't feel like this in the beginning....... I looked at my room and my eyes stopped somewhere. I walked to it and grabbed it.... it was......