I Take Pride in What I Am (Fairy Tail: Fraxus & Loray)

Love and Leaving

He lost. That's the best way to describe it, really. Not just the battle. Freed had bet everything on Laxus but didn't manage to break even in the end. He turned against his friends - people who trusted him, cared for him, gave him a home when he had nowhere else to go. And for what? Something he could not explain. Something he had been feeling for a while. A feeling he couldn't quite put into words. He knew it was well past loyalty. It burned. But it wasn't a fire, exactly. It was a slow burn moving through him. Devouring him. Wiping out everything.

Everything except for Laxus.

Freed took a long look at himself in the mirror. The look in his eyes shocked him at first - the despair that seemed to swallow them. But he supposed it was fitting, given the circumstances.

A knock at the door startled him back to reality. He collected himself before heading to the door and hesitated a moment before finally pulling it open. He must have taken too long - or perhaps he was not the only one feeling hesitant - as the man who had knocked already had his back

turned and was a few steps away, leaving.

"Laxus," Freed said quietly, but the dragon slayer could hear almost anything. The larger man stopped then turned around. He scratched at the back of his own neck and avoided eye contact. He was not putting on his tough guy act - he never needed to with Freed, after all.

"Gramps kicked me out," he stated, though this was not news to Freed. He had heard as much while his own fate was being decided by the guild master. Freed had expected to be kicked out of the guild as well and had nearly accepted it when Makarov delivered the verdict. Freed was grateful but also felt guilty, like he was getting off too easy... and like he was letting Laxus take the fall alone. "I thought I should say goodbye before heading out," Laxus continued. "And um... I'm sorry, ya know?"

"Don't be," Freed protested softly, shaking his head. "You didn't force me to do anything. I made my choice."

"Yeah, I guess. But I can't help feeling like I took advantage of your loyalty. Thinkin' back on it I've probably done that too much. I should have been a better leader and... a better friend, too. You deserve it."

"But you've been a great leader and a great friend!" Freed blushed at his own outburst. "I wouldn't be the man I am today if I hadn't met you," he added softly.

"Heh I don't know if I deserve that much credit." The two men stood in silence for a moment, both feeling the tension of the situation and neither knowing what to say next. "But you know... you really are amazing. And um... I really do owe most of the successes I've had to you, so thanks."

"Oh! Um no need to thank me," Freed responded, flustered and blushing even brighter. After a moment he added, "So you're really leaving?"

"No choice. Believe me, I'd stay if I could."

"Maybe if we talk to Master Makarov-"

"Stop trying to save me, Freed," Laxus shook his head gravely. "I appreciate you always looking out for me, I really do. But I went too far this time and we both know it. I'm just glad that you, Bickslow, and Evergreen get to stay."

"You shouldn't have to take the fall alone, though. By staying... I feel like I'm betraying you."

"Loyal to the end, huh?" Laxus chuckled. Then, moving in closer he added, "Don't worry about that. It was my dumb idea. I'm the one who took a shot and missed. Now I have to pay for it. I don't mind, honestly. This is how it should be. Besides, even if gramps gives me another chance, how can I show my face in Fairy Tail again after what I did?"

"They'll forgive you if you apologize. You know they will," Freed could hear the desperation in his own voice and it made him question what he really hoped to gain from this.