Drinks and Drabbles

Strings Attached (kth - angst)

Sometimes, in moments where you're left to your own thoughts, you think back to when it all started — with pleading eyes and hands clasped together, begging in the tone of his voice as the birds behind him flutter together in the trees and sing their love for Spring. The season of love, as people call it, and some are more desperate than others to find their significant others. In Taehyung's case, however, his friends and family were desperate to find him a significant other. Which somehow lead him to your usual study spot under the trees one morning, with a pleading request.

You'll pretend to be his secret girlfriend for the rest of Spring, in an attempt to ward off those who spend too much time invested in his romantic life, or lack thereof.

When you think about it, it made sense that you were the one he went to. You had worked together on a project a month prior, having spent a lot of hours at each other's places and in your preferred study spot. Because your relationship with Taehyung was strictly study, you were barely introduced to those close to him, only ever seeing glimpses of his flatmates from time to time when the two of you would talk a little too loudly in excitement over the development of your project. You could easily create a fake 'secret relationship' out of the time that the two of you had spent together.

In that moment, when you agreed to be his fake girlfriend for a little over two months, you thought that it was going to be easy. You got along with Taehyung well enough, and he seemed like the person you'd like to be close friends with in the near future. Your obvious shy nature would mean that public displays of affection wouldn't be necessary to show off that you're together. A little bit of fleeting touches here and there, plus a genuine friendly connection, would probably be enough to convince people around you that the two of you are dating.

There'll be no strings attached, you had promised to yourself, and to Taehyung out loud.

But here you are now, lying down on a hotel bed and staring at the ceiling. Alone in your thoughts, trying to figure out the exact moment you found yourself completely, utterly, and hopelessly in love with Kim Taehyung. Maybe it was when you started spending more time together to prepare for his cousin's wedding. Maybe it was when he introduced you to his family with sparkly eyes and such convincing affection. Maybe it was way before then, when you first started working together for that project.

Perhaps figuring out when you fell in love with Taehyung doesn't matter. What matters is that over the last two months, you've found yourself pretending less. Longing gazes and love in your eyes started to project truthfully instead of the intended fantasy.

The door of the hotel room clicks open and Taehyung walks in, jolting you away from thoughts. You sit up from the bed to see him looking a little too handsome in his outfit from the bachelor's party, hair sticking to his forehead from sweat, the scent of alcohol and cigarettes sticking to his skin.

"Hey," he says apologetically. "I hope I didn't wake you."

"It's fine," you whisper. "I was already awake."

"Thinking too much again?" he teases, a grin on his face.

You let out a nervous laugh. "Yeah. I was thinking about how time moves so fast."

"I know. Jin-hyung is getting married tomorrow. I can't believe it," Taehyung says, slumping onto the bed next to you with a sigh. "Time is weird."

"Yeah it is."

"I'm excited for tomorrow though," he says, turning to face you, boxy smile on his face.

"Me too," you smile, before shoving him off the bed. "Go take a shower. You reek of alcohol and cigarettes."

Taehyung groans, but he gets up and drags himself to the bathroom with complaints spilling from his lips. You watch him take his jacket off before he walks in, closing the door, and you turn to stare at the ceiling again, trying to will your heart to calm down.

-----

The wedding goes by smoothly, Kim Seokjin now a married man. The reception is lively and fun, fitting the married couple like a glove. Even though you've only known them for two months since you started being Taehyung's fake girlfriend, you feel an immense sense of pride and happiness for them. You probably even shed a few tears during the ceremony.

Taehyung ends up drinking one too many glasses of sparkling wine, and he stumbles around on the dance floor until Yoongi drags him to where you're sitting and talking to Taehyung's mother. You laugh a little at Taehyung's state, before agreeing with Yoongi's request and deciding to take Taehyung back to his hotel room. You bid farewell to Taehyung's mother as you leave, and try to keep out the bittersweet taste in your tongue that this may be the last time you'd be spending time with his lovely family.

The hotel rooms feels a little colder than normal when you arrive with Taehyung's arm draped over your shoulders. He mumbles incoherent words, before sitting down on the bed, dazed look in his eyes. You attempt to tell him to get changed into more comfortable clothes, but instead, you just remove his suit jacket with a sigh.

"How about you drink some water, yeah?" you tell him, moving to the sink in the kitchenette and pouring some water into a glass from the tap. When you hand it to him, he gulps the water down and stares at you with an intense gaze as he hands the empty glass back to you.

"Hey, Y/N," he mumbles, eyes not leaving your face. "If I asked you out for real back then, would you have said yes?"

You think back to what you thought of Taehyung back then, what you thought of dating and relationships back then. Despite being desperately in love with him now, you know that you would have rejected him.

"No. I wouldn't have," you answer with honesty, but your chest constricts when you say it.

Taehyung sighs, and you watch him take his eyes off you, but you don't miss the hurt in them. "Right. Of course."

You want to tell him that if he asked you now, you'd leap at the chance. That you'd let him hold your hand and shower you with kisses whenever he wants. That you want to continue spending time with him and his family. But when you finally work up the courage to say so, Taehyung is already snoring away on the bed.

The empty glass in your hand feels heavy, and you set it down on the bedside table before lying next to Taehyung in the bed. You stare at his sleeping features, overwhelming feelings of love suffocating your lungs. Letting the thoughts take over again, you look up at the ceiling, and plead silently to the blank nothing above you to help you make a decision.

You're afraid to risk it, you're afraid that you're too late, but you're going to bare your soul out to him tomorrow morning.