Type: Angsty Fluff
Ship: Bloodlust (Horror x Lust)
Determined by a poll. Thanks for your input, guys!
Third person
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Horror was driving like a maniac. He didn't care about the possibility of a crash, or being pulled over for speeding. All that mattered was getting to his destination.
Left. Forward. Right. Right. Forward.
He didn't want to miss anything. The sooner he got there, the better. They'd told him that everything was going to be okay, that he could visit, but still, he was worried.
Forward. Left. Right. Forward.
The hospital was only a few turns away, but it felt like hours. When he finally parked, slammed the car door, not bothering to lock it, and sprinted inside, he was escorted to a room on the third floor. It smelled like hand sanitizer, everything bright white and blue. A pattern of flowers decorated the walls, a few magazines on the table in the corner. And of course, Lust. He was laying there. Alive. Asleep, but alive. Tears came to Horror's eyes, he thought that he'd never seen Lust alive again, not after finding him in their bedroom, the pills he'd overdosed on scattered everywhere. He thought he'd been too late.
Horror went and sat in the chair closest to his unconscious lover, taking Lust's limp hand in his own. The action caused Lust to stir; he gripped Horror's hand tightly and his eyes fluttered open. Horror immediately stood up and wrapped him in a tight- yet careful- embrace.
Lust hugged him back without a word. They sat there for a long while, just enjoying the other's embrace. Lust stroked his skull, trying to comfort Horror, even if he was the one that really needed comforting. Horror buried his face in Lust's shoulder and cried. They didn't speak, but the silence that rested on them said a thousand words. Time ticked by, not that it mattered to them, and the world outside grew darker. Horror sighed. He knew that visiting hours would end soon, so he needed to say what he came to say now. He let go of the hug, taking both of Lust's hands in his own.
"Never do that again... I love you, you know I love you... please, never think, even for a moment, that I wouldn't care if you left." Tears tugged at Lust's eyes, the guilt on his shoulders growing heavier. "I'm not going to force you to talk to me. Not now, not ever. But I promise that I will always be here, and I will always listen."
Lust looked away. "I'm sorry... I could never say 'I'm sorry' enough, I know. I didn't know what I was thinking... I just wanted the pain to end." Lust choked on his words. "I felt so broken..."
Horror wiped away the tears that'd began to pour from Lust's eyes. "It's okay... I understand. It's normal to feel broken. You just have to let me help put you back together... tell me what happened, please.."
Lust nodded and took a deep breath. "It was one of those nights... Nights I feel... worthless. Like I have nothing to contribute. Like living trash.. Like I should pick up the knife I knew I had to put down... I knew how bad it was for me. I knew how bad it was for everyone around me.. I knew I have friends and family.. Hell, even a roof over my head and enough money to live on. I knew all of that... I fucking hate myself for not being able to appreciate it, though... I should be happy, right?.. I really needed a hug.. but I didn't want to burden you.. I wanted- needed- someone to tell me it's okay, even though I knew it wasn't... It was one of the nights I contemplate if people would actually miss me if I went through with it. Suicide. I was so close to the edge... and I knocked myself off.. I could never escape any of this.. I was stuck in a loop... so I broke it."
Horror didn't know how to respond. He didn't expect such an in-depth response so quickly, it was clear that Lust had been internalizing this. He began the only way he knew how. "I love you... I care. Even if you think you are a burden, I will always love at support you. It's okay to not be okay. It happens in life where we just want to end it right there and then, but trust me, it'll only hurt the people around you. I have experienced it first hand... so I know how bad it feels to lose someone that thought they were not supposed to be in this world. The pain you feel will be over soon.. You'll be content with your life soon, that's all I can say... You just gotta be patient and let your life unwind. You make people smile. You help them with life, help them get through things, especially me. If you think you don't deserve to be in this world, let it all out. Write it down. Sing a song. Talk it out with someone. It'll help. I'll help you in any way I can."
There was no need for any more words. Lust pulled Horror into a tight embrace, resting his skull on his partner's shoulder. Horror hugged him back, but quickly let go and made him lay down. Lust rested his head in Horror's lap, holding one of Horror's hands in his own, thankful for the embrace. Horror stroked Lust lightly, slowly brushing the vertebrae on his neck with loving touch. It was a method he knew always calmed Lust down. Lust quickly relaxed, releasing the tension he'd been holding, and let himself slip into a dreamless sleep. They sat like this for some time, the quiet beep of machinery around them, the smell of hand sanitizer beginning to irritate Horror. Despite that, he was extremely thankful that he'd been able to talk with and comfort Lust. He was willing to do anything to keep him safe. He would never let anything like that happen, never again. At least he knew what to look for now. He looked down at his sleeping lover, and smiled. I will always love you. Never doubt that, because it will always be true.
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Word count: 1213
ACk I'm sorry this was so short I don't know how to write fluff- also; I was feeling awful while I forced myself to write this, so I may have vented my feelings through Lust's dialogue. As for Horror's, I took some serious inspiration from a friend of mine of Discord. They always helped me through those feelings. Their Wattpad is Alliure Thank you so much for helping me, I appreciate you in every way. I hope you enjoyed this, even if it was short and took a while to write!
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Also, if you ever feel like you'd rather die then keep dealing with your life, you have resources you can use. Know that there are people around you that care about you, if not the people you know irl, then by me at least, for sticking through it until now.
National Suicide Prevention Hotline:
1-800-273-8255
There are always people you can turn to.
