Dreamy // oneshots

Guilty ; jaemin centric

The last thing jaemin could remember was a blinding light that shone so bright he only saw white, yet he felt so very calm and lifted from the ground the frantic mess of publicity seized to nothing but white noise.

Moments prier to this he was chilling on the couch when the dreamies suddenly took over the comfy big piece of furniture and driving him out of the living room with their overly hyped behavior, for whatever reason Renjun was staring holes into the back of his head with a stern look that had the older even more uncomfortable then the ruckus.

They had a show to take part in within the next few hours and wouldn't get ready until an hour's time passed but jaemin decided to get ready early since there really wasn't much he could do, then he heard the commotion more so Renjun yelling at Jisung, jaemin didn't mean to hear it and really wished he didn't.

"He's running us all down he can't keep up and his medical problems look to be coming back! How are you not irritated I know some of our fans are! Everyone can only hold patience with him for so long Jisung!" Renjun hissed "not to mention he fucking lost my music notes that had new warmups I wanted to try and a mix of mark hyung's notes." He added coldly.

Jisung let out a distressed sound and shook his head "what you said last night wasn't right you can't wish for someone not to be here, do you not get how much training and hard work he went through to be here, and his dancing is fine! Stop going by other's words what happened to being better then that!" His bottom lip trembled

"Jisung.." Renjun slowly started "We are only doing what we think is best... jeno agrees too and so does mark.. even chenle is facing the facts." He calmly spoke before cursing when Jisung broke out into a cry, of course luck wasn't on Jaemin's side as his knees gave out making him fall forward, small whimpers and hiccups escaped his failed attempts of suppressing his cries of hurt.

"Oh jaemin.." Renjun headed to go help jaemin by Let our a surprised sound when he was shoved away, "I know what you said I heard it all." Jaemin hiccuped and furiously wiped his tears before turning and lazily stumbling out of the dorms. He didn't even stop when Taeyong caught him in the hall or when jeno started calling for him, not even to chenle's worried calls and mark's loud half snort half wail sobs.

Jaemin took off as soon as he got out of the main lobby ignoring the lady at the front desk's worried questions, he ran and ran until he continuously tripped over himself, of course it was a rainy day and very gross out so he was getting soaked. What he didn't know was the second he turned to dash across the crosswalk a card came screeching into him and spun knocking him so hard he didn't have time to blink.

That's how he got to where he was now, blinding white lights and unable to hear his own voice, he couldn't move or breathe it felt like he forgot to breathe and no matter how hard he tried to, wouldn't know how. Jeno was the one who lifted his bloodied body clutching his unrecognizable nana close while sobbing.

Renjun stood dumbfounded and speeches while Jisung grasped his hair so tightly his head and scalp were becoming an irritated red, the fact no one even helped him or stopped to check out what went down hurt him, but again he didn't know all his members and several mangers calling for 911 stood around his body.

The white noise became louder until it was no longer there and the blinding light was gone, jaemin could finally see all his members looking devastated. He looked at Haechan the person who'd sneak into his bed the two of them sharing their knowing look of wanting cuddles after a long day of their affection being rejected, the brunette reached out to touch haechan's cheek.

The tanned korean didn't flinch nothing, jaemin tried again but it was like he wasn't there. Haechan sat in the hospital chair in fetal position with an emotionless dead like expression. Hospital?! Jaemin looked where his body lay hooked up into so many cords, "h-he's dying, if only you wouldn't have been such a careless cold hearted asshole Renjun!" Jisung stood fuming and tears still consistently falling.

"How could you be so cruel Hyung." Chenle sobbed as his shoulders shook, Renjun's tired eyes narrowed "dont bullshit me you all! Jeno you brought it up with me first and I agreed, chenle you came to me saying something similar on your own and Jisung you have always rejected his hugs of course he's hurting."

Hyuck abruptly stood "was." The whole room went silent turning their attention to Donghyuck. "You all are guilty, Mark you're like Jisung you rejected his love and mine. Jisung you didn't know but everytime he gave him a playful disgusted look or ran away from his love he took that shit like daggers to his heart, how many nights he'd come crying into my room wanting just to be loved to be one of us. Renjun you are straight up an ass your dirty looks and complaining about him as if you yourself don't spend hours before dance practices in the morning trying to get the moves right! And jeno all you do is take and take and take you have never took the time to look past his fake pouting to know something was really up you just demanded for him to cook and cook and cook! Chenle you have disrespectfully kept him up all night and treated him like your mother you made him do everything for you just because you didn't want to do it, you worked him to the bone. You all no we all took from him like selfish beasts. We made him feel avoided like a plague we did this to our nana we wished him gone!" Haechan was now gasping for air and wailing loudly while they all adverted their gazes in guilt.

"Leave. All of you leave. You don't deserve to sit here and cry for someone you unknowingly picked at and took from till he had nothing, the nights.. the nights he stayed awake making sure he had the dances down, the way he made sure to eat less portions whenever one of us were feeling sick claiming he wasn't that hungry when really he was but wanted us to be at our most healthiest, the meals he cooked and we all left the kitchen without saying thanks and leaving him to pick up everything, how we didn't include him and talked behind his back." Haechan kicked a chair over

"None of you not even me deserve this right to sit here crying. Something so willing we took from till they were nothing. We're nothing less then murderers." He sobbed and left the room mark following closely for comfort.

One by one they slowly left till it was just Jisung, "hyung I'm so sorry.. please come back I'll do anything, I'll remember to remind you how much I love you every day. To thank you and help you clean up after every meal to never let the other hyungs talk bad about you and to notice when something is wrong. I took you for granted and I'm sorry."

Jisung gently reached up to grasp jaemin's hand "I wanna see you I miss seeing you smile." He sniffled.

After jaemin had passed Jisung was diagnosed with complicated grief, depression and schizophrenia. When often reminded Jaemin was gone he'd go into crying fits, have nightmares of what basically happened to Jaemin. He'd then have long periods of
Not wanting to do anything by curl up in Jaemin's bed suffering with small whimpers and cries, he also sometimes smiled at nothing claiming Jaemin was doing something with him, it was sad for all the members to watch as Jisung slowly fell apart.