Learn life

Chapter 2

At this point in life mirrors weren't my best friend. I again stood in front of the mirror in my room and looked at myself but this time I didn't worry about my wrist but my breasts, or as my mom would call breasts, boobies. I didn't care what they were called, it was as important as a fan in the dessert. I hated them none the less. Breasts were a sign you grew up and I didn't want to do that. I had seen how teens were, well technically I hadn't seen them in real life but only how they acted in movies. In movies teens are the bullies, the ones obsessed with being thick in some places and slims a needle in others. I didn't want to be a bully. I didn't wan't to grow up.

I placed my hands on top of my chest and pressed the fat closer to my rib cage. For a second I was a kid again but as soon I removed my hands I wasn't. I flopped down on the carpeted floor. Legs to my chest and head to my knees. The world stopped. Why couldn't time do the same? I looked down and hated what I saw. Why didn't an eraser for bodies exist? I clenched my fist and before I knew it I started punching everything I hated. I clenched my eyes shut, they didn't need to se this. I went on a rampage, my never let my emotions out and now they exploded. Rage, punch. Sadness, punch. Hate, punch. Nothing in the room got destroyed, only me.

When the emotions left me I was empty inside, everything had just escaped. I vaguely heard how the front door opend."We're home!"my mom and dad happily yelled. "Yeah, we're home" my bother Mike second but not with the same enthusiasm. I jumped down the stairs and stopped in the kitchen where my family were. My brother sat at the table and played with his phone. Even though we were about the same age he was way more 'tenny'. My mother sat on the opposite side of Mike, scolding him. I didn't hear what she said but I didn't listen closely, it was after all none of my business. Dad stood up unpacking a bag of pizza cartons. "I'm sorry but we didn't have time to cook food after visiting the principal""It's okay dad. I like pizza" I said and plopped down beside Mike. "Well I don't!" my brother shouted. "We have already had it like 5 times this week and it isn't even the weekend yet!" "Take it easy now Mike." mom said calmly." You are well aware that the only reason to we have eaten pizza is because the principal wants to talk about your behavior."  "And that's my fault?" "Yes" mom said calmly. I slowly started to get up from the tabel so I could return to my room. I hated fights. But before I even left the table Mike stormed up the stairs, angry as a bee. "I'll go talk to him" dad said and went up the stairs. "Teens" mom signed. "I'm glad my little Lilly still is here. You are so easy compared to your brother, sometimes even I forget you're siblings" She gave me a hug, it felt warm. I hugged back. Suddenly I heard shouting. It was dad and Mike. "You don't understand anything!" Mike yelled. "Well if you tell me I would!" dad yelled back. "I should probably go" mom said apologetically and let go of me. 

And then there were only me an a couple of pizza cartons. Here I sat alone in the kitchen while my family bickerd upstairs. God what I hated hated fighting, I couldn't take making people angry.  My worst nightmare was to grow up and be like Mike. I didn't want to start fights like him. I wanted to remain mom's 'little Lilly', but sadly time doesn't tick backwards.  

I looked out through the window and fixed my eyes on the stars, they were beautiful and much like my family. Not in the aspect that they were beautiful but the aspect that they looked to be really close but in reality they're millions of miles apart.