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When 17-year-old Arbor Hayes' best friend turns up alive after a mysterious six-month disappearance, she must piece together the fragments of her story to make sense of what happened. But as clues e...
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"Oh my God, I seriously want to die right now." I fling myself across Mey's bed and smoosh her pillow to my face, the silky fabric cool against my over-heated skin.
I managed to avoid everyone at school today. I arrived early and was in first period before the warning bell. And at lunch, I ate by myself in the library. Smith had a meeting after school, so I didn't even see him then. We texted back and forth like nothing was wrong, but I just couldn't bear to face him. Not yet.
The mattress dips as Mey slides onto her stomach next to me, her arm resting reassuringly against mine. "Okay, tell me again what happened. And this time, exclude all the cringes and groans. Just give it to me straight—no drama. Leave that to me, your friendly neighborhood thespian."
I suck in a breath and clench my jaw, taking advantage of the fact that she can't see my sour expression. "Smith came over last night and we were talking about Emma, that is, after she threw herself at him in my driveway—"
A whoosh of air rushes over my cheeks as Mey whips the pillow away from my head. "So I can hear you," she says, her tone borderline impatient.
I squeal up at the ceiling fan and roll my eyes. "Last night, after Smith and I talked to Emma, I asked if he was still in love with her. He said he did love her, but as a friend. And when I told him that I loved him, he said—and I quote—'I have to go'."
My stomach sours just thinking about it and I'm afraid I might throw up, even though I've barely eaten all day.
How could I have blurted it out like that? The only phrase in history that has the ability to make normally fearless men run for the hills. And I said it like it was no big deal. Especially after he'd just seen Emma for the first time in six months—alive—which is something none of us expected. If I could go back in time I would. Take back what I said. Even though I meant every word.
"So, he didn't say it back?" Mey crosses her ankles behind her and cups her chin in her hand.
"He didn't even acknowledge it."
I can see the wheels spinning in her head. "Well, there's your answer then." She rolls onto her side and gives me a determined nudge. "He obviously didn't hear you!"
"He definitely heard me. My mouth was an inch away from his." I squeeze my eyes shut and reach again for the pillow, pressing it into my face.
Once again, Mey whisks it away. "Would you stop doing that? Oxygen deprivation can lead to brain damage, and you don't want to kill off any I.Q. cells, do you? You're going to need them for college."
"College is literally the last thing on my mind right now."
Without warning, the bedroom door swings open and Mey's younger sister, Bo, barges in, her slight frame somehow finding a way to fill the entire doorway. "Thank God you're here! I need to borrow your white turtleneck pullover. The cashmere one you got for your birthday last year. I'm meeting Izzy at the mall in thirty-five minutes."
