Dried Lilies, Withered Hearts And A Lonely Path

•Chapter-3• A day for retrospection.

It was another lovely day in the generous city of Bhubaneswar, also known as the temple city of India and Khushi would rather wish it wasn't.

She would rather have the stormy clouds and thunderstorms over this lovely Summer weather anytime about now. She didn't know why she was all fussy and full of anxiety right now? She didn't know why she was feeling like breaking every single thing in her sight. She really didn't know what was happening to her.

Her nerves were all frazzled. Her heart racing a marathon. She could literally feel her heart jolt then stop abruptly then again jolt and let's not forget the fact that she was precipitating heavily. Her whole being was coiled and stretched like a spring, a little more strain and she'll be done forever.

And her senses on an override, she could literally feel the whole house coming alive under her fingers. Every sound, every presence magnified. It felt like someone was breathing down her neck every breathing moment. Shadows coming alive ready to jump on her any moment. Her breaths getting lost somewhere. She was breathing yet she couldn't feel herself breathing.

Everything was closing in.

Everything was suffocating.

Everything was fading.

She...She can't stay in the house. She can't stay indoors. She'll go mad.

God, she can't breathe. She can't.

She needs to go out. She needs to escape with these thoughts in her mind. She slipped on her wedges not caring much of her attire— a plain Anarkali or her appearance as she grabbed her purse and left the house.

Not caring much about where she went or what she did? She didn't even care she was totally new to this city and not aware of things around. Yeah, it has been more than six months since they shifted here but she hadn't been out. She isn't familiar with the landscape.

But staying at home wasn't an option for her too, anymore. She would go mad. She would really if she stayed inside. Walking in circles around the known area so she won't get lost. She spotted a small red-bricked building with green vines and hanging tubs decorating it. A cafe called "Felu's Friendly Bean" and with nothing else to do.

And no way, she was going back home now. She entered the cafe. It was a spacious thing with rustic vibes and polished hardwood floors. The whole interior was forest themed with log designed stools and tables, a green lounge at the back near a round stairwell leading to the loft where she could spy some more sitting arrangements. There seemed to be a rotating tree-shaped bookcase in the back of the room beside the stairwell and counter. The cafe was almost empty now. It being office hour and all.

Khushi couldn't help but be drawn to the slowly revolving bookcase like a moth to fire. She didn't know why she was doing this to herself? Did she like to torment herself? Was she really a sucker for pain?

You must be thinking why she is thinking like this, right? What's tormenting about going near a bookcase? A book doesn't hurl or insults anyone, does it? But in her situation it does. She knows a posh cafe's bookcase must have just English novels and not just any English novels but the likes of Shakespeare, Rabindranath Tagore and all. The likes it will take her ages to understand and each word will remind her of the insults she had to bear for favoring the Hindi language. For her limited English vocabulary and wrong pronunciation.

Every insult will come alive and she'll feel worthless and stupid. Why was she tormenting herself with this? Why was she nearing the bookcase? But you can't stop a train on the path of a train wreck ? You can just salvage what remains and she was going to do the same.

Reaching the case, her eyes took all the English titled books arranged on the top shelf and as her eyes raked the case from top to bottom. Her eyes stopped at the middle surprised. It wasn't just English novels there. There were some regional novels, the dialect totally unaware to her. But what caught her attention was the line of Hindi novels. Novels, she could read and understand.