Permission to love - The Rogue Pack

Chapter 4

As Sam pulled away from Aiden's embrace, her heart was heavy. She felt conflicted. On one hand, she couldn't help but emulate pure unadulterated happiness at the realisation that she had found not one, but two mates. And that one of those mates was Aiden.

Yet finding a mate, or mates, brought with it so many complications. It meant she finally had to open up to someone about the nightmares she had tried so hard to bury. She had to fully expose herself in front of someone, laying herself bare with the possibility that they would judge, criticise or, worst of all, reject her. And it wouldn't be like the rejection of a friend, harsh yet survivable. This rejection would ruin her. 

I'm not ready... I can't allow myself to be that vulnerable, she thought. But I don't have a choice... I can't expect my mates to accept a mate who is not willing to fully open up.  Also, there was the whole issue around the weakness that mates would cause... But she wouldn't let herself think about that right now. She had to get the wolves out of the DIR safely, and now that she knew that her mate was amongst them, that task had suddenly become much more stressful.

"We need to move," she announced, authority lacing her words. Aiden nodded in response, peering at the cell doors.

"Looks like we'll need keys," he stated, moving towards the front of the room where the slumped bodies of the guards still lay. As he rifled through their pockets, Sam moved through the cells, analysing the wolves. She needed to see who would be willing to fight if it came to that, needed to make sure they were prepared for all eventualities.

There were nine prisoners in total. Some seemed younger, maybe seventeen or eighteen whilst others had grey hair, although all were so skinny, their cheekbones so prominent on their faces that Sam couldn't be certain of their ages.

"Where are the bloody keys??" Aiden grumbled to himself. He'd finished rifling through the pockets of the three individuals and was now looking around the room.

The peace in the air was suddenly shattered by a wailing siren, as flashing lights went off throughout the room. The spinning of the lights was disorientating, casting long shadows across the faces of the prisoners. 

Fuck. She'd needed more time. How am I going to get them out and take down the compound? I won't be able to save them all. I'll have to choose which ones to save. I can't do that. I can't condemn any of them to another day here. To be the only ones to stay, knowing that their companions have escaped. I couldn't do it. 

Eyes frantic, Sam scanned the room desperately searching for the keys. But there were none. She could just make the scuffle of boots through the ear-wrenching screech of the siren. A frustrated growl rose in her throat, as desperation and hatred rose in her throat. 

Once again the DIR had forced her to do the impossible. Forced her to commit inhumane actions, solely justified by the lack of choice for the alternative. She killed so that she wouldn't be killed. She would have to leave prisoners behind so that others could be saved. 

NO! No... This time, I won't be forced to leave someone behind, I won't be forced to abandon someone to their deaths, I won't stare on helplessly as someone else is hurt because I couldn't do anything.

Fueled by her anger, she grasped the door nearest to her, and pulled, grunting with the effort. The door came flying off its hinges, the metal twisted in her grasp. Aiden turned at the noise, eyebrows raising in shock and amazement.

Fucking hell. He would by lying if he said that the display of power and dominance didn't turn him on, but the thought fled his mind when he saw Sam's face. Her features were contorted with anger, eyes shining blood-red. He watched as she moved to the next door and repeated the process. By the eight door, Sam's strength had visibly decreased, and it was all she could do to twist the metal of the door enough to create a small gap. 

As she worked, the prisoners hesitantly crawled towards the front of their cells. They seemed fearful of Sam and Aiden, yet obviously recognised the promise of escape that lay with the couple. A couple of the stronger wolves rushed to assist the weaker wolves as they stumbled with their first steps.

Only the purple-eyed wolf didn't make a move to start walking. Having crawled to the front of their cell, they crumpled, too weak to pull themselves any further. As if on instinct, Sam rushed to scoop up the wolf. Although taller than her, they weighed almost nothing.

The wolf immediately stiffened in her arms, and Sam cursed herself for not thinking. It was natural that they would be terrified of her. And she hadn't even waited for consent to touch them, something that she knew was very important for wolves, especially those who had suffered physical hardships of any nature.

"Sorry," she mumbled, moving to put the wolf back down. A hand on her shoulder stilled her and she turned to look at their face. A slight squeeze on her shoulder and a reassuring smile were all it took to make her understand that the wolf accepted her touch, and she responded with a smile of her own. Now that the wolf was out of the shadows, she could finally see their face.

Soulful purple eyes gazed back at her, eyes that seemed to display every emotion the moment the wolf felt it. Their dark brown skin was rich with a coppery undertone, yet Sam could see that it seemed pale, like straw that could be blown away with a single gust of wind. Their hair was kept in short curls close to their scalp, yet it was thin and lifeless, and instead of framing their face, it fell in clumps in her head. They seemed sickly and lifeless, as if they had lost the will to live. The DIR has sucked the vibrancy from their soul and the colour from their personality.

Their appearance awoke in Sam a desperate desire to protect, a will to live until she saw them healthy and happy. And whether that was by her side or not, she was willing to do anything for them to be human again.