One Up

talk

Y'all are insane I swear 😂 yesterday I woke up to 1k and today I wake up to 2k and will go to sleep with 5k that's crazyyyy I love you all!!

also...happy reading ;)

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For the second time that night, Anna and AG found theirselves in the same position they were just hours ago.

On Anna's bed, AG laid on her back with her head propped on top of two thick pillows. Her right arm was wrapped around Anna and playing with her hair, her left hand rubbing her back in soothing circles.

Anna laid on top of her, her head on AG's chest but facing away from her.

AG noted how quiet Anna had gotten and started to get anxious. Did I do something wrong?

"I haven't told you all of the aftermath after breaking up with Nick," Anna finally said, turning her head so she can look at AG. Her voice was laced with sadness.

AG stayed quiet, waiting for Anna to keep talking. "After him, I had so much trouble..." Anna paused, trying to look for the right word. "Admiring myself, I guess."

"It was hard to love my body the way I did before Nick. In our relationship he pressured me to do things I wasn't ready to do yet, as you already know. He left a bruise on my thigh the last time I stopped him, actually." Anna said with a small sorrowful smile. AG looked at her with a tender gaze, though her mind was thinking of new ways to torture the pathetic boy.

"I didn't want anybody to see my body the way Nick does: an object. He manipulated me into thinking that too." Anna whispered dejectedly, averting her gaze from AG. She felt embarrassed for saying that, but AG gently grabbed her face and turned it towards her again, telling her with once glance that she would never think of her in that way.

"Is that why you hesitate whenever I touch your thigh?" AG asked quietly.

"Yeah," Anna confessed. "It's not that I don't love your touch, I definitely do and you do a fantastic job when it comes to turning me on by just doing that." Anna reassured her girl with a chuckle, a smile making its way to AG's face.

"I'm sorry—,"AG started, but Anna politely interrupted. "You're different. It's okay." AG's heart fluttered.

"It's just that I can't fight off my initial reaction to the touch since I've spent so long fearing Nick when he refused to stop immediately when I first asked last time." Anna admitted. AG held her tighter. "I've gotten better at loving myself, but it definitely is a process."

"After him I was so scared to put myself in another relationship," Anna's voice cracked, and she let out a shaky breath. "I avoided them as much as I could. It's just...I loved him," Anna paused. "Before he changed, I had much love for him, but his new and not improved self took my heart and shredded in without mercy. I don't want my heart to break like that ever again. I think I might have some commitment issues because of him."

"Being with Nick convinced me that no one would love me for me and not my body," Anna sat up, straddling AG's hips as she looked down at AG's attentive eyes. "But I'm reconsidering that."

AG quirked her eyebrow, her heart racing as she silently urged Anna to continue.

"AG, I don't think I can properly describe how much you make me feel. You're always there for me, and always know the right thing to say. I sometimes feel like I'm burdening you with all of my emotions though. You came here so we could spend time and have fun together, yet all I've kept doing was crying."

AG looked at Anna in disbelief. "Anna, it's honestly—."

"—Okay!" Anna finished for her, her tone turning exasperated. She placed her finger against AG's lips, effectively hushing her when she tried to speak again. "And that's the thing AG, you're fucking amazing and I literally don't know how you deal with me. I feel like you give so much to me and I'm not giving enough back. I don't deserve you." Anna said softly. AG opened her mouth to speak, but closed it once she saw that Anna wasn't done.