Memoirs of Shepard: A Mass Effect Fan Fic

Chapter One: The Beginning

One

So, this is clearly not cannon. This is set between the end of two and Shepard being taken in by the Alliance.

Bioware is the brilliant owner of all the characters in this story!

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I stand looking out the small window in my quarters, my mind trying to make sense of the mess around me- the mess that is also known as my life. Kelly suggested that I write everything down- sort of like a memoir. Maybe it'll help, or maybe it won't- at least it'll help pass the time.

Pressing my forehead to the glass, I try to consider, seriously, where I should begin? Should I start at Elysium? Eden Prime? Birth? I shook my head at the last one. Death? I chuckled morbidly, knowing that that wouldn't be a logical place to start.

My thoughts are turned inward as I made my way to my desk. Where should I start my...report? Yes, that seems so much better than calling it a memoir or, god forbid, a book. I will be more inclined to finish a report.

"Okay," I mutter, turning on the word processor program on my personal terminal. "I'll start young- but not birth."

I was always a spacer- my parents both being marines meant that I grew up on one ship or another. I never thought the stars were extremely pretty or romantic...they were always just stars- balls of gas or planets, it didn't matter. I hardly remember a time when my parents were ever together for any amount of time. My parents are Captains Johnathan and Hannah Shepard of the fifth fleet in the System Alliance military. Those were such awe-inspiring titles when I was a little girl.

For all their faults, they loved me. For better or for worse, they were career men- they would no sooner retire and go groundside than humans could live on our own sun. I don't know whether it was from guilt or from fear of parental neglect, but I was a child who wanted nothing (or, at least, little- they never did get me a pony). I was never without a parent, though. I was a regular navy brat and proud of it.

I stop writing and look at part or that last line with tears in my eyes. "I was a regular navy brat," I murmur to myself. "That's what I told Kaidan right after Eden Prime." I reach over and touch the holo of him that still sits on my desk. "Kaidan."

Shaking my head, I look back at the monitor and sigh. Maybe words aren't what I need- maybe my past should stay in the past. Still, I keep going.

My mom sat me down when I was twelve or thirteen to give me "the talk." She informed me that it was just as embarrassing for her as it was for me- something I seriously doubted at the time. She told me that I was young and was beginning the stage of my life that would involve boys.

"Mom, boys have always been a part of my life," I pointed out, my cheeks a horrid shade of red. I remember hoping that she hadn't seen me staring at the new, young private.

"Sweetie, you just need to be careful. Boys are going to start looking at you and thinking about you differently and you’re going to do the same thing to them. You need to make sure not to let them pressure you." It was obvious to me that she was nervous and felt as though she was in over her head.