We were in the balcony of a hotel, we went there just because I want to pour out everything to her and in the hope of taking the rational decision. We went there straight from the tea shop which was about to close, at it was already 8:30 in the night. With the beer on the table cigarette on the hand and the sound of rain was hitting me so differently. I was saying so much of things and still have so much to say, the heavy heart was feeling so relief that time . Wiping up the tears and having the beers, I was pouring everything.
The balcony where we could have the clear view of the tea shop, I was visualizing us there from the 5th floor, I was visualizing how we used to spend hours to hours there. I find everything so weird and so dull there and wonder how happy I used to be at that place with him by my side.
At this point of time I have realized it was the person who matter, not the place.
I was going to tea shops all alone for couple of weeks,sit under the trees and just stare at those moving clouds. Everytime alone was not worthy. Silence was not meaningful.
I don't know if I could be happy once again with him. We were not into relationship kind of stuffs but I have realized having a friend is more important than getting into a relationship. If my boyfriend have dumped me, may be I would have moved on, in the hope that "I deserve someone better" but I was not getting over of the friend whom I met before 5 years. I'm here pouring my heart to the friend I met before 2 years, and I would forever thank her for listening to me and understanding me.
She was indeed a blessing for me.
She was saying, I should always keep the hope, like always believe that everything you wished at sharp 11:11 do come true. Everything that happens will happen for something good reason and we should live the life cheering everything we have. We should value the person we have right now, afterall every thing is the blessing. Having a new beginning is best then deweling over the past. Whatever is yours will come to you.
Just keep the hope!
I know I should be happy, and cherish over the things around but I don't know how can I even be happy without being with my happy place.
It was raining outside.
I still have lot and lot more to say.
I was reliving the same moment together with him despite of the fact that, he was not there with me. I don't know where he is.
That day I was going to bed remembering "what ever is your will come to you. Just keep the hope".
This hit me so differently.
