Me and the Gretchen Boys

Chapter 15: Seashell

"Carmen get up."

I slowly lift my head and see Shawn extending his hand toward me. I tilt my head in confusion. The last person I expected to break the silence was Shawn. I stare at his hand and I see visible irritation come across his face.

    Tired of waiting Shawn picks me up and throws me over his shoulder like I'm a sack of potatoes. My eyes widen in shock and my mouth gapes. All of the boys quickly stand up as if to protest but I hold a hand up to stop them.

    "I'll be ok guys. We'll be right back." I force a smile, shooting a thumbs up.

   "Don't follow us." Shawn firmly states walking away. I lift my head and take one last look at the boys before we turn the corner. I give them one more small smile.

***

Shawn takes me to his room and plops me down on his bed. He leaves the door slightly cracked. His walls are a plain creme color. The room itself is completely spotless as if no actually lives here. There is a huge bookshelf pushed against the wall with not a single speck of dust. It's obvious Shawn uses it religiously. Right next to the bookshelf is his desk. There are sticky notes covering the majority of the desk. It looks organized yet messy at the same time, I'm guessing Shawn has his own organization method that only he can decipher. I search around the room for any signs of a 16-year-old boy. My eyes stop at a plant by the window. I feel little relief to know Shawn has a little bit of humanity. That relief is soon gone when I see a ruler right next to the plant. It's just an experiment.

I turn my attention back to Shawn who is standing in the corner of the room. "So what do you need?" I ask.

Shawn takes a couple of steps toward me.

Shawns eyes are squinted slightly and he responds, "It's ok now. No one is here." I tilt my head in confusion wondering what exactly is his point.

Step.

I laugh and mimic, "What do you mean 'It's ok now. No one is here.'?" Shawns face is dead serious not easing up in the slightest. My laugh seems to not have moved him at all and he stares at me with those nonchalant eyes of his.

Step.

"You can cry," Shawn says bluntly now in my face. There's nowhere I can run. I can't stand that bluntness of his; always so straightforward. One tear streams down my face. Before I can even wrap my head around the whole situation, I burst out in tears letting them all flow.

Shawn stiffly wraps his arms around me enveloping me in a hug. It's a nice gentle hug that makes me feel completely safe. I snuggle in more to his body crying my heart out.

After a while of crying Shawn awkwardly begins to rub my back. With every stiff motion, my shirt becomes more and more bunched up at the ends. His supposed to be "comforting" gesture is very rough. It's like a windshield wiper. With that thought, I instantly giggle.

"What's so funny?"

"You suck at rubbing someone's back," I say laughing. I slowly pull away from his body and as soon as I do, I already miss those stiff arms of his around my body.

"I'm sorry I do not excel in back rubbing." Shawn wears the most deadpan expression on his face and I laugh more. By the time I'm able to actually calm myself down my ribs ache. I get up off the bed and stretch my back out and all kinds of bones pop.

"Thank you, Shawn."

"I didn't do anything major." Shawn checks his shirt that is wet from me tears.

"Sorry about that," I say embarrassed, "This felt really great. This is my first time actually crying over my mother ever since I've gotten here... I guess it just really registered with me that we're actually apart..."

There's a cringeworthy silence that overtakes the room.

    Good going, Carmen. Look at where you rambling has gotten you.

   I look around his room to distract myself from the awkward silence. I stop at his bookshelf and examine it from head to toe like it's the most intriguing thing on earth. My eyes stop at an orange spiral seashell. My eyes light up with excitement as I grab it and hold it up to my ear. I close my eyes and envision I'm on the beach. I feel the sand in my toes. The air filled with a sea smell. I feel the light breeze that rocks my body back and forth.

I peel my eyes open to see Shawn staring at me like I'm doing something very bizarre and unorthodox.

"What? You don't know that if you put a shell to your ear you can hear the ocean?" I question him lowering it from my ear.

"I know that your supposed to hear the 'ocean' but in actuality, it's just the sound of air that gets bounced around. The shell is just great at amplifying-," Shawn pauses as his eyes meet mine, "Never mind."

"What? Keep talking."

"No, it's nothing."

Shawn's POV

   I shut my mouth to stop talking. Carmen's eyes are filled with so much innocence and happiness. She just got done crying about her horrible past and her insensitive mother. Who am I to crush her dream about hearing the actual "ocean" (even though it's outlandish).

My thoughts are cut off when I fell a smooth surface around my ear. I look down to see Carmen's arm outstretched to me as she holds the shell to my ear. I begin to protest, but she holds her finger to my lips stopping me.

"Shawn close your eyes and relax. Tell me what you see." She lowers her finger to give me access to talk.

I guess I'll play along with her little game, "I envision myself at the beach."

    "Well obviously. Add some more creativity to it. Give me detail." Carmen reprimands me. I can tell she's pouting in annoyance just by the sound of her voice.

    "Ugh, fine. The sky is a little cloudy and-," I stop myself from talking. From a distance, I can see a girl in the distance. She wears a flimsy wide brim straw hat and a black swimsuit. Over her black swimsuit is a sheer cover-up that is embroidered with flower shapes. Her chestnut curly hair blows in the direction of the wind. She moves around whimsically like an angel. I can hear her light laughter that sounds so warm and inviting. The mysterious girl as a whole is so alluring; drawing me to her.

I walk closer to her. As I approach her more and more, the clouds in the sky disperse. The now completely visible sun shines brightly. The sand becomes very soft and comforting on the bare balls of my feet. I finally make it to her and she turns around. It's Carmen. She smiles such a sweet smile at me and extends her hand. The sun illuminates on her face exposing every feature.

She's so... beautiful.

My heart begins to race. I've never felt this foreign feeling before. I feel my nonchalant and emotionless facade breaking down. I can feel my mask slipping. I can feel this warm feeling that spreads throughout my body.

I open my eyes and look at Carmen staring at me with anticipation eagerly awaiting my descriptions.

"I saw a beautiful...view. It appeared out of nowhere and forced its way in my heart. I've come to find out that I like it. I like it a lot."

•••
A/N

I'm back! I'm feeling much better and I'm ready to keep ok writing!! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! It seems that Shawn has a little crush ;)

Anyway critiques are always appreciated and I thank all of my loyal readers! Don't forget to comment and upvote. I hope you have a beautiful day❤️❤️