always ask why //phan

fortunate confrontation

~phil~

today, when i took my sister to the playground, I couldn't get the mysterious stranger out of my mind. if he sees my reply to his words on the slide, he wont know its me. i know who he is, but, to him, im just another kid at the park who has nothing to do with him.

thats why when i saw the boy walk to the slide, i started planning when to approach him.

he has to know who i am. i have to tell him. and then maybe he will tell me what hes going through and i can help.

i just really want to help him.

i glance towards the slide after putting my sister in a swing, and see that the boy is writing on the plastic again. i watch as he puts the lid on the marker, takes a step back and looks around. hes trying to make sure that no one saw him, i can tell.

his eyes sweep over the playground once more, except this time, his gaze meets mine.

his mouth parts slightly in surprise and my cheeks faintly glow. he turns and is about to leave, but i jog over to him, gently placing a hand on his shoulder. he stops and turns around.

"hey!" i smile as kindly as i can, and watch as his face shifts from nervousness to confusion and back again.

visibly shaken, he replies, "h-hi?"

it now dawns on me that i have no idea what to say. "i-uh... i saw you... uh... write that thing..." his dull brown eyes widen.

"im s-so sorry! i-i know i shouldnt h-have... i d-dont really know wh-" i cut him off, and he immediately takes a sharp intake of breath and wipes his glassy eyes.

"no! n-n-no! i was the one who wrote the other thing!"

"you were?"

i sigh, suddenly exhausted. "yeah."

his face is still painted with confusion, but now its mixed with another emotion, one i dont recognize.

i take this opportunity to start a different conversation. "im phil." i say, holding out my hand.

he hesitantly takes my hand. "im dan...?"

he stares down at the ground, clearly not interested in small talk. i keep trying anyway. "so, how are you...?"

he whips his head up and meets my eyes. his fascinatingly dark brown eyes seem to stare through me. i can tell hes not entirely present in the moment.

he opens his mouth to speak, but immediately closes it. he frowns. "do you really think that i would tell you how i am? i have no idea what youre trying to do here, but im not your charity case. im not a lost puppy who you think you want to help just so you can feel better about yourself."

i stare back at him, slightly affected, but i don't show it. "why?" i ask simply.

"what?"

"why?"

"look, mate, i ju-"

i cut dan off. "why dont you want my help? why am i not allowed to help you out of whatever situation youre in? can i at least take you to the doctor so they can look at your nose?"

"no. i don't need you to treat me like a kid. im not your son. i dont need another dad." he paused then added, quietly, "the one i already have is pretty shit."

"at least you have a dad." i whisper, mostly to myself.

"what do you mean?"

"my dad committed suicide two years ago. never left a note or any explanation. it sent my mom into a deep mental hole, that she will probably never get out of, and she disappeared about 7 months ago. she left me with my little sister, valerie. its just been us two ever since."

"i-oh."

an uncomfortable silence falls between us. "i dont want you to keep hurting. im not sure why, but you just seem different to me. you seem strong. you can get through whatever youre going through." i say.

he stared at his feet for a minute. "what if i cant make it through? what if i fail?" he meets my eyes again, and i see that his are slightly glassy.

"you wont. i know it. but i can help you if you feel like you will."

"i... okay."

"then lets go. we can go get coffee if you want...?"

he nods. valerie runs over to us and begs me to pick her up. i happily oblige and we start off towards the nearest cafe.

(this chapter kinda sucks.... i didn't want it to feel rushed but it does seem like it is. i was stressed out a lot in these past two weeks and i couldnt really think straight. i also didn't want to delay this update any further. my writing will {hopefully} be better in the future!

i still hope you guys are enjoying the story so far!)

           ~parker