You & I

IV.i Namgi

Warning: long chapter + very important message at the end!

Yoongi felt miserable, to say the least. It's been a week since he last saw Jin. A week since they bonded. A week. Every day, whatever overwhelming joy Jin had infused him with has been leaking out of him, slipping through his desperate fingers that longed for the touch of his soulmate. The powerful bliss that had once overflowed from his heart was now ebbing away as the tired muscle pumped cold blood that felt like lead through his system. 

To make things worse, he had a splitting headache, his lovesick brain swelling with thoughts of Jin in an attempt to make up for his absence. His body felt numb, his skin extra sensitive as if it was searching for any trace of that brilliant sensation of his soulmates touch in his surroundings. He was anxious, always fidgeting with the need to search for Jin to the ends of the Earth, never mind the fact that he was usually inert as a rock when he didn't need to move. And he was restless, unable to sleep until his stinging eyes cried out for the comfort of tears, whereas he could usually sleep anytime, anyplace.

After seven days of this torture, he couldn't take it any longer, he needed to find Jin. He'd given his soulmate all the space he could have possibly needed, but now that space was suffocating him. So even if Jin wasn't ready to see him again, he needed to see him. He needed his soulmate.

It was with that conviction that Yoongi left his stifling dorm and set out looking for Jin in the cold rain that flooded the skies with darkness. If he had thought about it for a second longer, he would have realised how insane his plan was, but he had left his room in a hurry to expend the overpowering energy holding his body hostage. So he just walked, a feeble umbrella his only shelter from the relentless downpour that threatened to drown him. 

The fat drops that plummeted from the sky, rejected from the Heavens, cried out to Yoongi to join them in their suffering. But Yoongi refused, his sheer necessity to find Jin driving him forward. Seeing this, the pitiful rain stabbed at his exposed arms and wept at his feet, soaking the sneakers that disturbed their pity party puddles with a violent splash as Yoongi ran through the rain. 

By the time Yoongi escaped the tragically howling wind, he was shivering. He hugged himself and rubbed his arms for warmth as he walked into the library. Although Yoongi was determined to find Jin, he wasn't a lunatic, so he decided it would be best to take refuge in the closest school building. His feet led him to the only place he was familiar with in that library: the psychology section. That's right, Yoongi, a business major has spent less than half an hour in the business section of his school library over the past three years. Yet, he has spent countless hours reading psychology writings. It started with him wanting to know how to control his own mental illnesses, but nowadays he finds himself at this very shelf at least twice a month, fascinated by the complexity of the human mind. 

Now, however, he has no spare capacity to ponder the science of the mind, because his was overrun with thoughts of his soulmate. Therefore, he grabbed a random book, staring into some middle distance as he sat down at a table. Immediately, he pulled out his phone and opened his abandoned chat with Jin. He smiled at the last message Jin had sent before their last meeting: 'Yoongi! I guess I was too excited to meet you again, I'm so early ㅠ_ㅠ ppalli, get here :(' Yoongi had arrived at the restaurant just a minute later, having been equally as excited for their reunion as Jin.

Yoongi frowned. How come Jin was more attached to him before they bonded? Just a week ago he was so eager to meet Yoongi again that he arrived fifteen minutes early for their lunch date, and now he hadn't reached out to him in a week. Was he actually being rejected? What went wrong? It all happened so fast Yoongi wasn't entirely sure anymore.

He typed out his first message to Jin in a week: 'Hey Jin, how are you?' He tsked and then spammed the backspace button. He tried again: 'Jin, we need to talk.' Aish, too serious. 'Hey Jin, I don't know about you, but I have felt completely miserable every day since-' No, that's way too desperate. But he is desperate. He groans, deleting the unsent message before throwing his phone onto the table and slumping down in his chair, pulling at his dark locks in frustration. Wasn't the relationship between soulmates supposed to be easy? He dropped his hands into his lap, staring at his phone screen and the mocking messages of a happier time which it displayed.