Fiolee: Through Thick and Thin

Chapter 7

Fionna POV

I did what I had to. I know what I felt, and I didn't like it. It would only cause trouble. So I lied. I'm in love with Marshall. I love everything about him-how he acts, his boyish appearance, how he flips his hair when he's composing a song, the way he can tell when I'm unhappy...which is why I can't be with him, ever. I'm too far in, and if I do what my heart is pushing for, I'm sure to get hurt again, and I'm sick of it. If I stay away from Marshall, maybe I'll get over this stupid feeling in my chest. And of course, guess who came by at just the worst moment possible? That's right, the exact vampire king I'm trying to AVOID. Not to mention the fact that I was also crying, which would be real suspicious to the amazingly nosy being.
I could tell straight away that he wanted to get the dirt on the tears rolling down my cheeks, but I was-am-still so aggravated and, dare I say, scared of the fact that I was in love with yet another who would break my heart in an instant once knowing he held the fragile thing in his hands. So yes, I snapped at him. Yes, I told him I never wanted to see him again. And no, I didn't mean it. But what am I supposed to do after that? Just pretend it never happened? Make him think I just go around and lie to people on an everyday basis? Geez, this whole love thing is making my life a big fat clutter.
Approaching the door to the tree house, I can hear Cake singing. Great, there's no hiding from her now. Taking a huge gulp of air, I collect what little confidence I can gather and swing the door to the side. I give my adopted sister a plastered grin, hoping-praying-that she won't suspect anything. She stops her singing and glances over at me, a worried look flashing across her face for a fraction of a second, then all smiles.
"Hey baby," Cake says, sounding as if there's not a worry in the world despite my puffy eyes and half-assed smile. "Do you have what I asked for?" Oh, I had almost forgotten the task I went to fulfill. Taking the jerky out of my pocket, I hurriedly tell Cake, "I'm not feeling well, so I'm just gonna take a nap in my room, okay?"
Rushing up the staircase, I can feel the piercing eyes of a certain cat following me. I choose to ignore them, withholding all feelings until I'm out of sight. I concentrate on counting the steps I take until I enter my room, until I can think, until I can let everything go. Twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty, thirty-one...
Finally. Some much needed peace. But not quite quiet. More like...silent. An overpowering silence filling up my ears, traveling through my body, trying to fill up a Marshall-shaped spot in my heart. The feelings take over, and I feel the annoying sting in my eyes, the uncomfortable tightness in my chest, and the uncontrollable urge to crawl up into a ball and hide away forever. But an adventuress doesn't hide from something she fears. She faces it like a strong-willed, smart, true woman.
Walking up to the small shard of mirror hanging on the drab wall, I look at my reflection. Her face is pink and tear stained, her blue eyes swimming in a sea of uncertainty, the scars on her face and bags under her eyes standing out more than usual. I look her straight in the eyes and tell her exactly what needs to be said.
"Fionna, I know you're scared, and you're worried, and you're angry. But I also know you're brave, and smart, and persistent. I promise, we will get through this."