runaway.

chapter 8 - alone again.

stella.

luke's hands are comforting. his skin is soft and warmth radiates from his palms to my face. i sort of nuzzle my cheek even further into his hand on one side. it feels good, too good might i dare say. how close i am to letting my eyes shut close before i hear the question he's been hinting at. stella, are you being abused at home? it makes me sit up, wide awake, pulling myself away from him. his hands linger in the air for a moment in the lost presence of my head before falling to his lap.

"n-no!" i stutter. strong thoughts and emotions race through my head until i can't think straight. confusion is written all over my face. my eyebrows are practically stitched together. it's a good act for someone who's lying.

luke looks a little nervous himself. his face is twisted into an expression i cannot decipher. there's a hint of hurt from the way i pulled away from him. i regret the action because i miss his comfort the second i lose it. it's moments like these where i wish i could rewind time and get a do over. i do dumb things. can i try again?

he lets out a breath that he was holding in. "lift up your hoodie then stella."

it feels like the walls are moving in towards me, compressing me into the corner of the couch. i feel claustrophobic. i need to stand up. i can't deal with this right now. i'm up and moving towards the door within seconds. my hand reaches for the handle, but luke yanks my body back with unexpected force. he quickly maneuvers us to switch places so that he now blocks the door with his body, leaving me trapped.

"let me leave dr. hemmings!" i screech, reaching for the door handle again. he grabs my wrist to which i counter by grabbing for the exit with my other hand. in a swift motion luke catches both my wrists in one hand then restrains me by crossing his arm over my chest, pulling my back into him and locking my arms in place.

"stel-" he tries, but i am hysterical.

"let me go! please! please let me go dr. hemmings. i wanna go home. i've had a bad day. i don't want to be here anymore please." i beg, attempting to fight my way out of his arms. his grip is too strong and my fighting is getting me nowhere. i tire myself out rather quickly until i'm hanging limply like a worn out rag doll.

"stella please, please calm down. you're okay." luke pleads with me, soothing over out of place hairs that have become tangled from my kicking and screaming. i don't realize i am crying again until a tear droplet hits my arm and trickles down to luke's. "if i let you go, you have to please not try to make a run for it again. you can't escape this anymore."

defeated, i nod and he releases me. my nervous mechanism kicks in, making me tug and pull and my hoodie sleeves. i can't even gain the courage to look up at him and stare at the floor at his shoes instead.

"now come on angel girl." he instructs not waiting for me to move and lifting me up by my waist on to the exam bed. under his breath he mumbles "let's see what's under this hoodie," but not quiet enough that i can't hear it. luke's hand begins to reach for my hem. my own hands shoot out to his chest to prevent him from going any further.

there's a moment where his eyes meet mine as the room falls silent. we stare at one another studying the other person's face. luke begs to be let in while i beg for him to stay out. i try one last time, "please luke."

he shakes his head and sighs in exasperation. "just stay calm, okay? no matter what's under here, it's going to be alright."

i let my head hit his shoulder, defeated once again and now embarrassed. i can't bear to see his face when he sees the way my body has been destroyed. he reaches for my hem for the second time, but this time, i don't interfere. cold air hits my stomach as he lifts the hoodie up, stopping under my chest. there's a sharp inhale. i'm not sure if it's his or mine.