So Much More

I Get What I Want

      The farther we go into the depths of the backstage, the more people there are. Walking hurriedly back and forth, they all carry sound equipment or instruments. I barely have time to look at all the people properly. The three of us walk down so many hallways that I feel like I’m lost in wonderland. Niall leads us through so many halls, obvious that he knows his way around.  I wonder if we could sneak away while Ana is distracted. That would be very irresponsible and very much like me.  I can’t help but grin.

“Emmy,” Ana walks next to me, her voice very low, “Were you trying to get it on with him?” She squints her eyes accusingly at me. I laugh.

“You know me so well!” I grab her shoulders and squeeze her, “Would you let me? I mean now you get to meet the whole band, and for free! I think you owe me a little, dontcha think?”  She just shrugs.

We walk for a good ten minutes. Niall looks at us sheepishly. Ana and I look at each other, a little afraid at what his face is suggesting.

“I think the rest of the band is in the dressing room or already on the tour bus. But I think the former is more likely. The dressing room we got should be in one of these halls, aight?” he says while continuing his pace down the current hallway. I, being the mischievous vixen I am, skip up to him and grab his waist. Leaning in close to his ear I whisper to him.

“When will we get to finish what we started earlier, Irish boy? The curiosity is killing me, ya know?”  In return, he kisses my cheek. Odd. Not the reaction I would expect from a 19 year old boy. My first instinct is to pout until I get the response I want, but I have no chance. Niall is pulling a door open that lets out a barrage of smells and noise.

“Here we are, I present the band to you, Ms. Ana!” Niall smiles that same smile that he did when he was on stage and holds the door open for the both of us to enter. I smile a small one back and follow in my little sister, who was silent most of the walk here, erupt into a ball of excitement. She glances back at me, as if for approval, so I nod. Ana walks up to the boys who quieted at our arrival.

“Hi, I’m Ana Wilson. Niall said I could get a picture with all of you because I caught him with his tongue in my sister’s mouth,” she speaks loudly. My jaw drops.  You will pay for this later Ana, I swear.  Niall on the other hand turns as red as a beet. The rest of his band breaks into laughter and take to Ana, agreeing to signing her few things and a picture.

“So, if you want, I got time before we leave to go get a drink or something?” Niall speaks quietly next to me, resuming his shy demeanor. A drink? That’s not really my style. Will I get what I want out of it? Maybe. Is it worth it? He might ask for my number and then get attached, and ugh want me to be his girlfriend! I’m so not into that type of commitment.

I look up at him. He’s looking at me with a look of hope. He is literally like a puppy dog. A cute, fake blonde, puppy dog.It can’t hurt to have a drink or two with him I guess. I mean that’s the normal thing girls do right?

“Yeah, how about this coffee house called Java Joe downtown. It’s open late, I’ll meet you there around 11?” My answer emits a huge smile from him, teeth and all.

“Oi, what are you grinning like a fool for mate? Get over here for this picture!” One of the boys yells. Niall blushes again and saunters over to stand with his bandmates.

“Emmy, will you take the picture please?!” Ana is ecstatic, bouncing like a ball towards me with her IPhone dangerously wobbling in her hands. Quickly I snatch it from her hands and amble backwards to set up for the photo.

“okay, on three every one say ‘Nip slip’!” I shout, “Three!”

“Nip slip!” comes a chorus of 5 band boys and my 15 year old sister.

-

“Emmy, this has been the best night of my entire night and it’s all thanks to you! I love you so much!” Ana has been in tears since we said our goodbyes to the mostly British boy band. Since we got into the car however, she has been sobbing gratefully about how happy she is that she got to meet them. Thank every god in the sky the ride home is only 20 minutes, otherwise I might have to say we weren’t even for tonight. But if all goes as planned, I can consider us pretty even.

“Alright, alright, enough crying. Go inside and tell mom all about it, I’ve got stuff to do,” I declare as we pull in front of the house. Ana wipes at her eyes. Then they suddenly get big,

“You’re going on a date WITH NIALL HORAN?” she practically screams. Holding up my hands in defense I tell her it’s not a date.

“Oh no, Emmy. You can’t just fuck and forget Niall Horan!” the waterworks start up in her eyes again. I want to roll my eyes, and I almost do, but Ana isn’t finished.

“You can’t just treat him like a toy! He is a human being with feelings! You’ll hurt him just like you hurt every other boy you call a fuckstick!” Furiously, Ana gets out of the car and slams the door. This isn’t good, but I can’t help myself. I roll down the window to shout back at her.

“You only care because he’s famous!”

“You only want to do it because you don’t care about yourself!”  Ana shrieks back. The door to our house slams close. Ouch. Her comment sinks all the way to my stomach, making me want to vomit. It’s not true. It’s not true. I fucking love myself. I’m the shit. 

I peel away from our house, burning the rubber on my tires. Blowing past one too many stop signs, I stop at the next one to dig out the cigarettes under my seat. Jamming the box on my leg until a stick comes out, I shove one angrily in my mouth.

“Who tha fuck she think she is? Telling me who I can and can’t fuck. I just took her to the concert and got her to meet those fucking boys she’s crazy about,” I mutter angrily. On my dashboard, the clock says 10:50. I’m going to be late. Traffic in the city is shit this late at night on the weekend. Too bad I don’t have his number to call and tell him he’ll be waiting a good 10 minutes.

I drive fast and recklessly, so it’s not surprising that i never get to light my cigarette and that I get pulled over a block away from the shop.

“Motherfuck,” I pull out my papers from the passenger side. This will take a good 20 minutes. Fuck, he’s going to leave and I’m not going to get laid.

I’m waiting for my stuff to get processed when I see a strapping young blonde walking on the sidewalk.  Just my luck. I roll down my window and yell at him. He comes over and when he recognizes me, he smiles that big stage smile.

“Emmy, I thought you’d stood me up,”

“Well, I do what I can to get what I want,”