adopted by carrie hope fletcher and oliver ormson

staying with jodie, liam and oliver for the week

Today is the day i was going to stay with jodie, liam and oliver for the week, i was really nervous as this is the first time i had  been away from Carrie for longer than a couple of hours, also im still getting nightmares about my past  that not even carrie knows about. 

it was around 9am on a bright but cold sunday when  i woke up to the smell of pancakes and bacon being cooked so i leave the comfort of my bed for the last time for the week and walk down stairs and into the kitchen and see carrie at the oven. i walk over to her and give her a hug "good morning maddie how are you my love" carrie says as she puts the pancakes and bacon on a plate for me and hands me a cup of coffee. 

"im ok i guess just a little tired" i reply letting the steaming hot cup of coffee warm my hands up. i was more than a little tired i hadn't  slept at all last night but didn't want to worry carrie as i knew she wouldn't want to go on tour if she knew i was struggling. carrie looked at me like she didn't believe me but continued to eat her breakfast, I look down at my plate and just push my food around it.  

carrie comes over to me and grabs my hands and says "maddie what's wrong i know you were up all night i could hear you crying from my room so dont tell me you are fine"  i sigh the start to cry so carrie takes my hands and leads me to the sofa and sits me down than sits down next to me and wraps her arms  round me as i say, 

"ever since i came home with you and found oliver again i have been getting these really bad flashbacks to when i was living  with my mam and dad and i haven't been able to sleep due to the flashbacks and nightmares i keep having when i do fall asleep" i look at carrie and just breakdown 

i than say " i dont think ive slept properly in a good 7  or 8 months now as the nightmares started after i told my best mate what went on with my mam and dad" carrie just hugs me tighter and kissed my head. As she held me she got her phone out and started messaging someone who i guess was jodie 

CARRIE'S POV 

After Maddie told me that she hasn't slept properly in 7 or 8 months i message jodie to tell her that she would need to keep an eye on Maddie to make sure she doesn't have a panic attack or something 

Carrie: Hey jodie hope your well, just thought i should tell you that you may need to keep  an eye on maddie as she has just told me that she has been having flashbacks and nightmares about her past 

Jodie: hey carrie im good hope your well,  i will make sure she's ok hun. 

carrie: im good just worried about maddie as she spent all night crying last night. thanks jodes i know you will look after her 

MADDIES POV

while carrie was messaging jodie i must have dosed off cause then next thing i know is that im back at home living with my mam and dad , my dad was drunk and arguing with my mam about something and the next thing i know my dad is shouting at me telling me i was a disappointment to him and my mam and thats when i realized they were arguing over a test that i had taken at school the day before. My dad came closer to me and brought his hand up to slap me  i started screaming "NO DAD  I'M SORRY I WILL TRY TO DO BETTER I PROMISE". 

Thats when i woke up i looked to my left and saw carrie looking at me with concern in her eyes  she turned to me engulfed me in a massive hug and whispered calming words into my ear as i cried into her shoulder after i had calm down carrie asked me if i wanted to talk about it i stood up and ran to my room shut the door and grabbed the photo of me,  oliver mam and dad  on holiday in america  when me and oliver were around the age of 3. i looked at it and started crying saying " why did you do it dad wasn't i good enough for you"